I have text messages where transfer of money is discussed. Some of them list that she was applying for a 50K loan. I still have to got through all of them and print them out so that I can review and highlight those parts but just looked quick and found one where I stated "Okay. How much you want to owe me? 16k then?" and she responded "Whatever u want. Remember I said that yesterday".
However, there was never a written agreement that was signed unfortunately. I really did believe that she was sincere for a while and thought she could be a long term relationship, but now I'm just stressed, disappointed and embarrassed over the entire situation.
Thank you for your question. Please permit me to assist you with your concerns.Please do not be embarrassed, this situation happens far more often than most care to admit. The fact that you have the texts is extremely important, because it then shows that the amounts provided were not gifts but that she agreed that they were debts which she 'assumed' by promising to be responsible for the obligation. This is really the key here--even without a contract those texts show intent and that may be enough to allow you to take her to court and seek a judgment. Please be aware that the amount is far beyond small claims in New Jersey, so you would likely need to retain counsel and sue her in district court for the funds owed. You do not have the strongest case in the world but those texts are likely enough to help you prevail. You can either pursue this with a collections attorney or with a general practice attorney. The latter will likely be cheaper. My apologies but there is no pain and suffering claim here--you cannot sue someone for breaking your heart and possibly going off to be in a relationship with someone else--it is not public policy. But you can sue for your debts owed and also for your attorney fees.Good luck.
Does having screen shots of her being in a relationship longer than she admitted to me have and bearing on the case? She was asking me for money and help under false pretenses by playing on my emotions by saying things like "Lets see what happens". 2 days before I found out about the relationship we met at a mall to give her the money. Because it was during work and he was "busy" we didn't do lunch but she said we can meet up later since she was only seeing me for 5 min. When I reached out to try and make plans she skirted the question. My gut has been telling me about the red flags for months, but I didn't listen.
At this point the broken heart part isn't my concern at all. I'm actually happier knowing now and glad to not be wasting my time. It's the being lied to and mostly the money that is making me sick.
John,Thank you for your follow-up. Her relationships have no bearing. What matters is only whether or not there was a contractual (not a romantic) relationship between you under which she promised to pay back the money. False pretenses does not really play into it since you still gave the funds over under your own choice--I am still concerned that without a contract the transfers may be considered a gift rather than a debt, but if you can establish that she promised to pay it back, then the underlying cause under which the funds were obtained is not really related to the case.Hope that helps.
Sorry to ask again but since the last email I found the messages below that I downloaded from one of our FB conversations before she started blocking me. Would her offering to go to a lawyer help solidify the case that it was a loan?
December 12, 2012 at 5:08 pm
John,That may go toward intent--it definitely may show that she was aware that this was not a gift but a financial obligation. So that type of a comment may be useful.Good luck.
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