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Alex J. Esq.
Alex J. Esq., Attorney at Law
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Experience:  Experienced Licensed Attorney
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I have no agreed upon nor court ordered (not yet, anyway) child

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I have no agreed upon nor court ordered (not yet, anyway) child or spousal support that I need to pay, but I want to stay pro-active so that I am seen favorably by the court (and to support my children) when the time comes. Until any support amount is legalized, I have been cautioned to get some form of written acknowledgement or receipt from her that amounts given to her are to be counted toward any court ordered support.

Is this true?.....if I just send her a check, should I write something in the Memo or on the back of the check indicating that cashing the check indicates her acceptance that this is payment for that month's support?.....can I say that by cashing the check indicates her agreement that cashing the check, she is not entitled to any more money for that month?

If I can do the above, what verbiage should I put on the checks?

....I live in Virginia (Loudoun County), if that makes a difference.
Hello. My name is XXXXX XXXXX I will be happy to answer your question.

Can you please let me know if a petition to establish child support had been filed against you?

Is your name on the birth certificate of your minor child(ren)?

How many children do you have?

Please provide me with more information about the situation.

Customer: replied 3 years ago.

A petition for Separate Maintenance and Child Support has been entered. The children are 8 and 10, and my name is XXXXX XXXXX birth certificates.....according to my lawyer, since we are sharing the children 50/50 (a week at a time), and given our finances, child support would be about $450/month. My lawyer is filing a motion (I forgot the name) to dismiss, since no Grounds for support or separation are identified (not can they be warranted).

Dear XXXXXt,

Are you still legally married to the mother of your children?

Have you consulted with your lawyer about your intention to provide for your children while this matter is pending?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

yes, still legally married....there has been no petition for Divorce, and in Virginia, you must be separated for 1 year prior to divorce. My lawyer says the court will eventually order me to pay support (in the area of $1500/month for spousal and child), and says if I start paying before being ordered, it would look favorably on me when the time comes for the court to order it.

Customer: replied 3 years ago.

it's been almost 30 minutes since my reply to you.....should I wait for a response, or will it be much longer?

Dear XXXXXt,

Thank you for your follow up.

I would agree with your attorney that making voluntary payments of spousal support and alimony would look favorable and would help your case further down the road when it comes to divorce and child custody.

Unfortunately, while you can make payments that you feel are reasonable and appropriate for the child support / spousal support, before such are ordered by the court, the mother cannot agree to a reduced amount of child support, without the court's approval, so even if the mother signs an agreement that she will accept lesser child support payment, as payment in full, the child support in intended for the minor children, so the court could still order higher amount to be paid by you and can make such child support order retroactive to the date of filing the petition, however as long as you do put in a check's memo "undifferentiated support" any amount paid would be applied to any back owed child support / spousal support.

It would be a good idea if your attorney can reach a written agreement with your wife's attorney for temporary undifferntiated support, while the case is pending.

I wish you the best of luck!
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

perfect....that's exactly what I wanted.


Thanks very much.



Dear XXXXXt,

Thank you and I wish you the best of luck!

Please click on the "excellent service" rating, so I can receive credit for my answer. Bonus and positive feedback is always appreciated, but is not required.

Alex J. Esq. and 13 other Legal Specialists are ready to help you
Dear XXXXXt,

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