I have a case - BD554643 - with Los Angeles Superior Court on N.Hill Street with Judge Marmaro. The Judgement and Order Stipulate our Co-Parenting Agreement, which is included 2 days on, 2 days off, 3 days on, and so on. It says if there is a change in employment status, we should come up with the change, or meet with a Mediator, followed by a conciliation court.My ex got a job in Torrance, and she lives in Santa Monica, I in Venice. She will leave the house at 6:15am, and get back by 5pm. I have been doing the bulk of the child-care - happily - as she has looked for a job. The baby in 17 months old today, and doesn't communicate yet. She asked me to change our schedule in favor of her dropping off the baby, and me dropping the baby on her days to a babysitter with 2 young sons, which I am adamantly against. The baby needs individual attention, and I have the ability to work at home, assisted by a daddy's helper. She refuses, and has retained counsel for an Ex Parte tomorrow (Friday), saying that she needs the court to change the times or she will lose her job, and that I am not cooperating. My offer has been to be the baby-sitter - for free - and she has rejected it.An Ex Parte is for an "emergency" situation, which this doesn't sound like, but I don't know. I will be representing myself, as I don't have money to retain counsel. Also consider that this judge is extremely conservative.How do I win my argument? What should I bring to court with me? Does LA recognizes the best interests of the child/tender years, are is each co-parent able to do what they want on their custodial days?Thanks for the time...
Country relating to Question: United States
State (if USA): California
Hello and thank you for the opportunity to assist you. There may be a slight delay between your follow ups and my replies as I am typing out my answer. Please remember that this is general information only, not legal advice, and no attorney-client relationship is formed.I am very sorry for your situation. It is not unusual for parties to abuse the ex parte option, but if the Court feels that this was done needlessly, then that backfires on them.Ex parte means that a party requests an order to be signed even before the other party is served due to an "emergency," and then the matter is reheard once you are served (and this is what I understand is happening tomorrow).How do I win my argument?There is no "silver bullet" here. You seem to have a valid argument already, so the matter is simply to give the Court your argument and hope that the Judge agrees with you. Understand that so far, the Court has only heard her version in the ex-parte, so now you have a chance to tell the Judge what the reality is from your point of view.Whatever you argue - remember to stay away from phrases like: "That is not fair." Always steer the conversation to "best interest of the child," i.e. "Your Honor, I feel that it would be in the best interest of the child if..." or "Your Honor, I do not believe that Movant's request is in the best interest of the child is more in her own best interest..."What should I bring to court with me?There is really little to bring in terms of paperwork, because this is an argument rooted more in the subjective "best interest" doctrine than anything else. However, if you wish to illustrate your points, you may wish to bring an enlarged map on which you can guide the Judge when you are arguing distance. Also, any emails between the two of you what shows her being unreasonable may be helpful.Does LA recognizes the best interests of the child/tender years, are is each co-parent able to do what they want on their custodial days?Yes. "In any custody determination, a primary consideration in determining the child's best interests is the goal of assuring stability and continuity." (Burchard v. Garay (1986) 42 Cal.3d 531, 538, and fn. 6 [229 Cal. Rptr. 800, 724 P.2d 486, 62 A.L.R.4th 237].) However, if by "tender years," you mean favoritism of the mother when dealing with young children, then this is no longer the case. In re Marriage of Carney, 598 P. 2d 36 - Cal: Supreme Court 1979.I hope this finds you well. Please click Reply to Expert to keep talking, or rate my answer when we are finished. Kindly rate my answer as one of the top three faces because this is how I get credit for my time with you. Otherwise, reply to chat more until we are finished and you are ready to rate. I work very hard to formulate an informative answer for you; please reciprocate my good faith. (You may always ask follow ups free after rating.)
With "tender years" I mean the doctrine that the baby stay with the nurturer when he is young. I've always been the nurturing parent, and she has not challenged that.
Also, is this a time to ask for "full legal custody" (i.e. ability to make decisions for child)? My ex was non-communicative and controlling during marriage, so you can imagine she is a stonewalling dictator now.
Fred,With "tender years" I mean the doctrine that the baby stay with the nurturer when he is young. I've always been the nurturing parent, and she has not challenged that.The Court has moved away from that, but it still strains to ensure "stability and continuity" (Burchard). So you can use this to your advantage.Also, is this a time to ask for "full legal custody" (i.e. ability to make decisions for child)? My ex was non-communicative and controlling during marriage, so you can imagine she is a stonewalling dictator now.You can if you would like. You have the option of asking for modification of orders in a cross-action here, or, in a separate action.Know that in order to be able to win modification of custody, you would have to show two important things:1) that this is "in the best interest" of the child. In re Stephanie M., 867 P. 2d 706 - Cal: Supreme Court 1994; and 2) that there are "changed circumstances" that require the modification, that were not present at the original decision. Id.I hope this finds you well. Please click Reply to Expert to keep talking, or rate my answer when we are finished. Kindly rate my answer as one of the top three faces because this is how I get credit for my time with you. Otherwise, reply to chat more until we are finished and you are ready to rate. I work very hard to formulate an informative answer for you; please reciprocate my good faith. (You may always ask follow ups free after rating.)
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I can request a Modification of Order in the Ex Parte?
I am afraid not without first filing the actual (counter) petition for it.
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