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Alexia Esq.
Alexia Esq., Managing Attorney
Category: Legal
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Experience:  19 Years of Legal Practice Experience in this precise field.
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Husband is mentaly ill ( sever horder with mood disorder),age

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Husband is mentaly ill ( sever horder with mood disorder),age 72 and retired. wife working. with two kids ages 10 and 12,adopted great nieces of wife's. In over heads in 3 mortgages, plus 18,000 credit card debit. Have tried 2 phychologists with him in past 12 years. Just went through medical Dr. for a new referal. Finances mixed with debit from befor marriage from husband plus newer debit from using over draft protection. Short sold his parents house leaving 31,000. debit I co-signed that ended up being wifes house held for colateral instead of his. 3 mortgages one will finish in 2015 the first mortgage. 2 second mortgages one variable one fixed at 30,000 and 33,000.
Want control of more space Hording issues here. Want freedom of his mood problem. Hoping they can give him shots to help him. He won't take medication but might be able to convience him to take shots if reconmended. I want to sort the finances and seperate ours to gain control of mine. Unsure if bankruptcy is an answer and or divorce
*Due to rules of your state bar or mine, nothing herein is intended as legal advice, only intended as general information to better help yourself.

Hi, I'm so sorry for your troubles. Are you the wife? Can you specify what your legal question may be here?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
I want him to stop verbal abuse seek help clean out his stuff or move out. It is hard as he sees any attempt to explain this as an personal attack on him. I am seen as abusing him. We keep going back and forth. If the Dr. cant help what information will help in a divorce? I am still working with the medical recomadation. But I am not to hopefull with it. I have not complety given up. But there are days I am so frustrated I wish to never have to look at his angery twisted face.
Hi, oh my, I am so sorry for what you are going through. This is really more of a personal decision rather than a legal one. Once you decide WHETHER to file for divorce or just stay and deal, then you will know what legal questions to pursue. He is mentally ill, it sounds like, and you are not equipped to cure him - it is not even clear that a medical doctor can do so. You can not force him to leave his home. However, if you file for divorce, and if that home is owned by the two of you, the judge can order that one of the parties gets the home. You could argue that it is pointless to give it to Husband, because he is unable to maintain it, because he is mentally incapable of not creating or keeping the dangerous hoarding situation,and ultimately, the home may be condemned, leaving it good for NO ONE. Also, you could ask for exclusive possession of the home, in order that the children are protected from the unhealthy mess he creates and leaves in the home - that his behavior is really an act of child abuse, even though it may result from his illness.

SInce you have 3 houses, you can also consider taking one and giving up the others, but I would first confer with a bankruptcy lawyer, as even that likely won't result in you being able to keep more than one house. You can also consider renting out 1 or more of the properties, if you aren't already, to cover those mortages, or moving into one so you don't have to live with the hoarder, and take your children with you. Or, if the houses are not underwater - sell them to pay off your debt and start fresh. YOu can't cure him, likely, so staying with him may just be an act of enabling at this point.

It sounds like (and I could be wrong here) that you have options, you just can't make the decision to take action. Change is hard, but sometimes not changing is harder - and the children have GOT to be the biggest victims here.

I hope this helps clarify for you.

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