How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Alexia Esq. Your Own Question

Alexia Esq.
Alexia Esq., Managing Attorney
Category: Legal
Satisfied Customers: 11743
Experience:  19 Years of Legal Practice Experience in this precise field.
10805288
Type Your Legal Question Here...
Alexia Esq. is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

Husband is mentaly ill ( sever horder with mood disorder),age

Resolved Question:

Husband is mentaly ill ( sever horder with mood disorder),age 72 and retired. wife working. with two kids ages 10 and 12,adopted great nieces of wife's. In over heads in 3 mortgages, plus 18,000 credit card debit. Have tried 2 phychologists with him in past 12 years. Just went through medical Dr. for a new referal. Finances mixed with debit from befor marriage from husband plus newer debit from using over draft protection. Short sold his parents house leaving 31,000. debit I co-signed that ended up being wifes house held for colateral instead of his. 3 mortgages one will finish in 2015 the first mortgage. 2 second mortgages one variable one fixed at 30,000 and 33,000.
Want control of more space Hording issues here. Want freedom of his mood problem. Hoping they can give him shots to help him. He won't take medication but might be able to convience him to take shots if reconmended. I want to sort the finances and seperate ours to gain control of mine. Unsure if bankruptcy is an answer and or divorce
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Legal
Expert:  Alexia Esq. replied 2 years ago.
*Due to rules of your state bar or mine, nothing herein is intended as legal advice, only intended as general information to better help yourself.

Hi, I'm so sorry for your troubles. Are you the wife? Can you specify what your legal question may be here?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I want him to stop verbal abuse seek help clean out his stuff or move out. It is hard as he sees any attempt to explain this as an personal attack on him. I am seen as abusing him. We keep going back and forth. If the Dr. cant help what information will help in a divorce? I am still working with the medical recomadation. But I am not to hopefull with it. I have not complety given up. But there are days I am so frustrated I wish to never have to look at his angery twisted face.
Expert:  Alexia Esq. replied 2 years ago.
Hi, oh my, I am so sorry for what you are going through. This is really more of a personal decision rather than a legal one. Once you decide WHETHER to file for divorce or just stay and deal, then you will know what legal questions to pursue. He is mentally ill, it sounds like, and you are not equipped to cure him - it is not even clear that a medical doctor can do so. You can not force him to leave his home. However, if you file for divorce, and if that home is owned by the two of you, the judge can order that one of the parties gets the home. You could argue that it is pointless to give it to Husband, because he is unable to maintain it, because he is mentally incapable of not creating or keeping the dangerous hoarding situation,and ultimately, the home may be condemned, leaving it good for NO ONE. Also, you could ask for exclusive possession of the home, in order that the children are protected from the unhealthy mess he creates and leaves in the home - that his behavior is really an act of child abuse, even though it may result from his illness.

SInce you have 3 houses, you can also consider taking one and giving up the others, but I would first confer with a bankruptcy lawyer, as even that likely won't result in you being able to keep more than one house. You can also consider renting out 1 or more of the properties, if you aren't already, to cover those mortages, or moving into one so you don't have to live with the hoarder, and take your children with you. Or, if the houses are not underwater - sell them to pay off your debt and start fresh. YOu can't cure him, likely, so staying with him may just be an act of enabling at this point.

It sounds like (and I could be wrong here) that you have options, you just can't make the decision to take action. Change is hard, but sometimes not changing is harder - and the children have GOT to be the biggest victims here.

I hope this helps clarify for you.

Because I help people like you here, for a living---this is not a hobby for me---I sincerely XXXXX XXXXX abiding by the honor system with regard to Accepting answers, by Clicking your ACCEPT button now. Feel free to follow up after, if you need clarification. An ACCEPT also assures that I can assist you again. A BONUS is a wonderful way to tell the expert her time and effort are appreciated. I wish you the best in your future.

Alexia Esq., Managing Attorney
Category: Legal
Satisfied Customers: 11743
Experience: 19 Years of Legal Practice Experience in this precise field.
Alexia Esq. and 19 other Legal Specialists are ready to help you

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Mr. Kaplun clearly had an exceptional understanding of the issue and was able to explain it concisely. I would recommend JustAnswer to anyone. Great service that lives up to its promises! Gary B. Edmond, OK
< Last | Next >
  • Mr. Kaplun clearly had an exceptional understanding of the issue and was able to explain it concisely. I would recommend JustAnswer to anyone. Great service that lives up to its promises! Gary B. Edmond, OK
  • My Expert was fast and seemed to have the answer to my taser question at the tips of her fingers. Communication was excellent. I left feeling confident in her answer. Eric Redwood City, CA
  • I am very pleased with JustAnswer as a place to go for divorce or criminal law knowledge and insight. Michael Wichita, KS
  • PaulMJD helped me with questions I had regarding an urgent legal matter. His answers were excellent. Three H. Houston, TX
  • Anne was extremely helpful. Her information put me in the right direction for action that kept me legal, possible saving me a ton of money in the future. Thank you again, Anne!! Elaine Atlanta, GA
  • It worked great. I had the facts and I presented them to my ex-landlord and she folded and returned my deposit. The 50 bucks I spent with you solved my problem. Tony Apopka, FL
  • Not only did he answer my Michigan divorce question but was also able to help me out with it, too. I have since won my legal case on this matter and thank you so much for it. Lee Michigan
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Tina

    Lawyer

    Satisfied Customers:

    8436
    JD, BBA Over 25 years legal and business experience.
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/MU/multistatelaw/2011-11-27_173951_Tinaglamourshotworkglow102011.64x64.jpg Tina's Avatar

    Tina

    Lawyer

    Satisfied Customers:

    8436
    JD, BBA Over 25 years legal and business experience.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/RA/ratioscripta/2012-6-13_2955_foto3.64x64.jpg Ely's Avatar

    Ely

    Counselor at Law

    Satisfied Customers:

    19941
    Private practice with focus on family, criminal, PI, consumer protection, and business consultation.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/FL/FLAandNYLawyer/2012-1-27_14349_3Fotolia25855429M.64x64.jpg FiveStarLaw's Avatar

    FiveStarLaw

    Attorney

    Satisfied Customers:

    8189
    25 years of experience helping people like you.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/jespoag/2008-12-17_222355_jessepic.jpg JPEsq's Avatar

    JPEsq

    Attorney

    Satisfied Customers:

    2132
    Experience as general attorney, in house counsel, SSDI, Family Law attorney, and law professor
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/gsenmartin/2008-04-22_214950_me1.jpg Guillermo J. Senmartin, Esq.'s Avatar

    Guillermo J. Senmartin, Esq.

    Attorney

    Satisfied Customers:

    110
    7+ years of experience handling various legal matters.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/PA/PaulmoJD/2013-10-10_195858_JAImage.64x64.jpg Law Educator, Esq.'s Avatar

    Law Educator, Esq.

    Attorney

    Satisfied Customers:

    31621
    JA Mentor -Attorney Labor/employment, corporate, sports law, admiralty/maritime and civil rights law
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/dkaplun/2009-05-17_173121_headshot_1_2.jpg Dimitry K., Esq.'s Avatar

    Dimitry K., Esq.

    Attorney

    Satisfied Customers:

    15975
    Multiple jurisdictions, specialize in business/contract disputes, estate creation and administration.