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There is nothing you can do at this point. The law presumes a child born to a married couple is the husband's. A challenge to this presumption must occur within the first few years of the child's life.
If the child knows your the biological parent, and since child is an adult you can reach out to the individual on your own. If the individual is willing you can establish a relationship moving forward. There is no legal restriction for you to re unite with the child.
This communication is not intended as legal advice. A local attorney should always be consulted for legal advice. No client/attorney relationship is intended or created by this communication.
She has no control over whether you contact the boy. This is now between you and your alleged son. She said she knew when the boy was 10. The only way to know for sure is a DNA test. What you really have is a strong suspicion at this point. I know this is difficult, but would you have insisted on a paternity test illegitimizing him when he was 10. The man that raised him would not have willingly given him up.