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Dr. Chip
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 21204
Experience:  Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
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Im having really bad nightmares about the anal things my dad

Customer Question

Im having really bad nightmares about the anal things my dad did
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Health
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Are they waking you up?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
They did twice
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Well so long as for the most part if you sleep through the night then they don't actually disturb your sleep cycle. There's no way right now to stop them
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I dont sleep trough the night. After i wake up from a dream im up for a while
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
But you said that only happened twice. The other option would be to take a sleep med
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
It did but it takes forever to fall back to sleep
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
No real suggestions then.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Alrighty then. Ive tried melatonin
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Well Ambien CR or Restoril might work
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Alright. Is it ok to wait to talk to the psychiayrist about this? Or should i talk to my pcp
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
You could just tell your PCP that your dreams are waking you up--you don't have to go into details
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Do you think ot needs addressed before i see the psychiatrist
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
It would be best to talk to your therapist about it
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
How long can i go with little sleep
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Are you saying this is every night?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Pretty much. But even when im not having nightmares i still wake up a bunch of times
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Well with dreams it is Stage 5 sleep so at least you get to that point so the sleep isn't a total waste
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Ok
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Anything else?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
My heart feels flutterly
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
As in?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
It feels like rapid and like i dont know how to explain ir
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Well, what's your pulse rate and BP?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Pulse 115. Bp 93/59
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Well that isn't too rapid a pulse
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I know
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
So why did you ask about it?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Because it feels different
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Different really doesn't help me
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Ok
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
We're just chatting here again
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Why do you suppose my dad hated me so much that he would molest me?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Why would it have to be a matter of hatred?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I dont know for sure. I guess i viewed it as punishment
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
No--it's a complicated thing but it can be from the perpetrator's own childhood trauma, low self esteem, doing what a man is supposed to do on a fairly defenseless easy target instead of mature women--lot's of possibilities--but it isn't out of hatred or as a punishment
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
The things my dad did wasnt normal
Behavior
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
I never said it was
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Maybe it was too embarrass me
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
I don't think it had anything to do with his picking you out for some reason--these people just do it and it has everything with them and nothing to do with the other person
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
If you say so
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
That really wasn't anything like a response
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I tell you what i think and you keep disagreeing so its kinda pointless for me to keep saying things
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
That's not the way to look at it--you just have a very hard time in topics like this being willing to consider that you might be looking at it the wrong way. In this case, you want to find some way to blame yourself and you just won't even consider stopping doing that.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
How is saying he did it to embarrass me blaming myself?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Well you also mentioned punishment--both words imply that you feel you deserved to be punished or embarrassed
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
This is so frustrating
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
That too is really not much of a response--take your time and don't waste page space until you really have a lot more to say
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I know i shouldnt blame myself. I know that no matter what i did my dad shouldnt have done what he did. I know my dads actions were wrong. I know all of this and yet i still blame myself. Im not dumb so i dont know why im having a hard time with this
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
I has nothing to do with intelligence or being dumb but unless I'm wrong no one until now has been challenging your thoughts about this.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
No one really knew about the abuse from my dad for the longest time.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
I know but now it's time to work on that and stop the festering inside of you that's been going on for all these years.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I dont want to tell my therapist the exact details of what happened
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Well, if you don't want to get better and don't want to work on this, then so be it.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Thats not what i said
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
No, but I already knew you don't want to do it so you didn't tell me anything new
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I wish my dad would have just killed me
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Understandable feeling but he didn't so it's time to move on
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I dont think you are being very understanding today
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Ho so--and be specific when you answer?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I feel like everything ive said you reply with things that make me feel like you are saying oh well get over it.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Not at all--I'm saying get over it by hunkering down and working on it. Move on means attack it, beat it, and move on.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Im sad. I feel like shutting down.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Shutting down?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I feel empty and im turning most things inwards and pushing people away. Like im ready to be done
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
So call your therapist and get in to see him
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Why? Why cant you help me
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Trying but I can't magically turn off that empty feeling
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
And you think my therapist can?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
I can't overemphasize the importance of face to face therapy
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Why is the empty feeling getting worse?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Depression feels like emptiness and it can get worse at times
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Nothing matters anymore
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
So what is it exactly that you want me to do here--and don't say IDK?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I want you to tell me what to do. I want you to makexme feel better
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
I told you I don't have a magic wand--at least call a friend
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I dont really have one that i would call
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
That, in my mind, says you basically don't have any friends
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Ya im just a loser. Ive tried telling you that
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
I think it's more likely that you do have friends but you're just too stubborn to call one of them
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I dont want them to worry about me
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Like I said--stubborn and I think there's some pride involved too
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
You just know everything dont you
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
No but you don't have to tell a friend exactly why you're feeling the way you do and that you just need to hear their voice and to talk a little. And a friend doesn't mind hearing that another friend is hurting
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
My friends at work already tell me they are worried. They say ive lost my spark
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
So call one of them.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
No
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Like I said--stubborn. OK--there really isn't anything more tonight I can do for you so try to get some sleep and I'll talk to you later
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Did i make you mad?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
No--I really expected you to refuse to take my advice. Sorry to say this but by refusing to call a friend you basically are just feeling sorry for yourself and would rather just keep on feeling bad
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Your wrong.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Maybe so but I can't come up with a better reason for why you steadfastly refuse to do something as simple as calling up a friend and chatting for a few minutes. You say your friends are already worried about you so you tell me why you won't call one of them.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I dont like asking for help. Why cant i just talk to you
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
I said just talk to one of them--you don't have to ask for help, just for an ear. Talking to me is fine but I can't be there all the time and you can't just rely on me alone.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
But you are here most of the time. And i can rely soley on you
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Here we go with the yeah buts again. There's no need to choose to just rely on me--right now you need all the people on your team you can get.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Im sorry. Im sorry if ive disappointed you. I choose to rely on you because you are safe and not hurt me
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
So how exactly would a friend hurt you?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
A friend could repeat what i told them. A friend could lie.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
So we're back to saying you don't have any friends because that wouldn't be a friend
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Pretty much
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Then why do you refer to them as friends?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
They are my work friends. I dont have personal friends
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Why not and don't give me the loser refrain here?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Because i dont need friends.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Then you're very unique in the world. And if you're so uniquely self sufficient, why can't you just fix yourself or at least get over all your troubles and not rely on the opinions of your family?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I think you. Are not being very nice
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
That's your standard comment. Maybe I was being a little sarcastic but I'm sure you got the point I was trying to make. And I got sarcastic because everyone needs friends--even you.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I know i need friends. My dreams are scary
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
I really don't have anything more I can say about or help you with with the dreams--proper give and take therapy works on that. Time for me to hit the hay so I'll talk to you later but, seriously, give a friend a jingle even if it's just to ask how they're doing.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I am sorry. Hope you are not disappointed in me
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Not disappointed at all--just trying to nudge you in the right direction
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I see my therapist today
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Good--work hard with him today and let me know how it goes. We need to close this page and remember about the rating every so often
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
One last question. How long does it take atenolol to work
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Usually it kicks in within 30 minutes to an hour
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
So if i took some of them at 330 this morning i should be fine?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Some of them?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I was sad. And took like 6
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
I really didn't need to hear that. You need to call your doctor about it and we need to close the page
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
You asked
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 1 year ago.
Yes but I didn't realize you meant that many--seriously, no more on this page

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