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Dr. Chip
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience:  Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
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What is it that makes you feel like you have to do something

Resolved Question:

What is it that makes you feel like you have to do something else, if you're enjoying yourself with some shows, you feel like you should do some other hobby just because others enjoy it? Is it cause you feel you're not doing enough?
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Health
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Can you give me an example?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Well i been watching home and away all day, now i start struggling seeing what is missing to my day, so previously my bf told me why would i waste my day doing this and that, so i kinda feel i'm wasting my day, if i do something i like that isn't really getting me anywhere mentally or well lifewise.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, I think I told you before that variety is the spice of life.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I know, but if i can't find anything else to do that i feel like doing, what do I do? I just wanna do something i feel passion for, but i don't feel much passion as of now.
Why would i feel bad about doing this all day, if it's the only thing i can do as of now, cause i'm tired. I just wish i was resting doing it. It might be the feeling that i'm leaving other hobbies behind to do it, like i could read a book, but i kinda wanna keep doing the addiction stuff(like watching the show).
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
How do you know you wouldn't enjoy something you've never tried before?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
it's not about not enjoying, it's about place all the addictions and make them fit together, or that i'm worried about my addictions, how to deal with it, like i wanna stop watching something i really wanna watch further or if i crave foods i wanna keep eating bad stuff for my body. i enjoy mostly anything if i start doing it, but addictions are getting in the way to live a normal life. What is missing in my life to make me start addictions like this?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, that's pretty easy to answer--real and healthy connections to other people for one.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I know what i can do about it, but i can't really do anything about it right now right? If i firstly did not sleep right tonight, and now getting tired, but can't sleep cause i am worrying about how my life is. This is what worries me, if i have a day off people where i don't really have people talk to, what am i gonna do about it? I know it's not making me feel good, what is wrong with me cause i can't sit quiet a day and just do things i enjoy?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
What happened with the one or two people you were going to get together with?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I been talking to a lot of people this week and i fixed things with this book and i enjoyed life until sunday, but this is what is problematic, taht i can't just enjoy a silent moment where i wanna do something useful, but can't cause i'm too sleepy, can't focus so to speak. My body feels heavy, i wake up with a pain in stomach, and this all leads to doing something that i don't need energy for, and this sucks really bad for me(i enjoyed my life as longa s i'm with people, but once i'm alone it really sucks). I need to be physically and mentally active to feel good, once i can't i'm feeling like this about anything i do.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
So what have you learned from the book so far?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Well now i know all the solutions to a good life, but if i sleep bad i'm all destroyed, what can i do to start relaxing again and feel calm about making my life a better one this week so i don't have to feel like this again, and how do i avoid feeling like this again.

basically i learned how to communicate and not let your problems go to new problems communicationwise. EAR- checklist, well mostly anything, but what my emotions are coming from, and if i got a problem what i can do to solve it(if it's my problem not anyone elses) -> like not cause of communication but what i'm telling myself. Basically i just don't know what i'm doing atm, why on earth do i even have a problem with this.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
So what's different about the last day or two from anytime before?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Cause i did not sleep enough i could not have the energy to do much, and i had to do something i feel passionate about, but now i just wish i didn't, cause it just worries me more and more that i was wasting my day. I wish i could of slept right all week(i did not have any meds so i been sleeping 5 hours a night). Resting is annoying to me, if i can't do something intelligent during the day.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
So has there been a time where, at least for a few nights, you had enough sleep?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
i had enough sleep but not in the right time, but this is mostly cause i been doing something active and have some fun during the day, then it's easy to fall aslepe when you're tired, i feel like i been waiting all day to get to sleep and now that i finally should sleep, i'm worried about all the stuff i haven't done. If i firstly sleep and feel like this i'm going to feel bashed in teh morning cause i'm knitting my muscles.

What is the feeling that causes me this worry?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Ever try to get up at a decent time in the morning and forcing yourself not even to take a nap until it's time to go to sleep at night?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I never done a nap in my life. It's just not working. Problem is that i'm not sleeping until 5 am or later, cause i been trying to keep myself awake all night and day, but it's not working if i'm too tired. I did 4 hours of sleep until dinner today, that's why i feel this way. Or if i don't sleep a day i'm also feeling worse than this.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Say i sleep from 1 to 11 normally, and i keep doing this every day, if i don't get the adrenaline rushing then i will stay awake longer than i should, now that i odn't have meds i am not able to start sleeping. i wasn't really able to the last week cause i f**ked up once and then i was in the bad situation again and didn't sleep until 3-4 and then it just goes on later and later until i'm sleeping at day time. at 5 am i mostly start feeling tired so this is a good time to fall asleep. my rythm is basically 25 hours and i can't really do anything to supress it, so if i gonna sleep i have to sleep at 5 am and wake up 12-13 cause that's when the body will sleep no matter.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, four hours is a bit long, but if it was before dinner, I'd refer to that as a nap.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
well say, i have to take a nap cause i was not sleeping during the night and i could not just hold my eyes up after 24 hours not sleeping. this is what i do every time i gonna do something 1 hour sleep, or 5 hours posisbly(if my eyes can't keep open) then i will wake up and that's my sleep for the day. Otherwise i don't sleep at all and go to bed at 5 in the evening and then i can sleep until 10 next day. Sometimes i just fall into bed at 5 am and sleep until evening 3-7.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
So has anyone tried to regulate your sleep cycle?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
well with circadin, but it's not working after 5-6 days, unless i decide it's gonna work and stop worry about other stuff. Basically all the noise in apartment made me get a bad sleeping routine again, i think i will tonight put the clock at 6 am and see if it will solve, since i'm tired now, i need to practice waking to the clock, if i only sleep 6 hours maybe i will feel good during the day and fall asleep at appropriate times. Then i should stop worry about stuff, if i can wake up to the clock.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Well i should sleep now, that i am focusing on it.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Sounds like a plan.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Gn, and thanks for helpnig, i didnt' think you'd be there. Hopefully i'll feel better in the morning.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
I'll always be here for you. Count on it.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I clearly have no clue what i was going to do when my thoughts are racing, since i was resting for an hour, did some sexual stuff and now i can't sleep, the thoughts just race ahead what i wanna do next week and who i gonna meet, and who i wanna be with, etc.. Every time i go to bed i start thinking about something i wanna do.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, that's not new for you.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
What is wrong tho? why i do this to myself, i decide to sleep but what on earth i'm doing to myself, destroy all i wanna do.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
You just won't sleep if you aren't sleepy.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I been sleepy all day, but now i'm awake, why? Just cause i said i wanted to sleep i don't. If i hear the word sleep 3 times before bedtime or i'm saying it to myself i'm all defeated.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, the only thing to do is to wait until you really are sleepy.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
ya i see.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
OK
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Well seem i'm very awake, i'll just try and look forward and get some fun stuff done.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Again, sounds like a plan.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Why do people worry about stuff all day long? Why would I use all my time thinking about my thoughts and feelings? Why is it becoming a problem to do anything else.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Say that again?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I found out how to beat my depression and anxiety. Why would i worry about things i can't do anything with. People just make me tired and depressed, why would i worry about what they think and what will ahppen to me, as long as i'm alive, there is nothing to worry about.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Sounds good.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Yeah dr. burns book is pretty nice. Then my family started getting me angry and after a while i figured how much anxiety and depression i've caused myself, worry about all that could be done, even if i don't really want to or what i feel like i can't do, and push it over to everyone else is kinda not working out, i'm in need of accepting i'm asperger and that it's nothing i can do about it.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, you can't do anything about having it and accepting that is key, but it still means you can work on overcoming it.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Ofcourse, i just don't wanna weaste my time worry about what people think all the time, and start other worries to stop thinking.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Sounds like you finally are seeing the light.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I wrote down all my worries(my sis told me to) and then i saw the list i got freightened, thus i went out and read book a lil bit, and read about anxiety and depression and then i could see how damaging it was to worry about things that isn't needed. So i guess i can go from 33 on the scale to much less in a few days if i start doing stuff rather than worry.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Sounds good
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I was on the seriously depressed and anxious scale, just due to some minor worries. Now i just must learn to communicate.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Really--you sound so much better today.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Well yes, but i hvae this tendency to yell for the moment(especially when i don't hear stuff), and my sis she can really put some effort on me, if she starts annoy me, so i yell then to to get heared. If people can't relate to me, how can i relate to them?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
But still, it does sound like you're making progress.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
yes ofc, i need to find a way to deal with hard people to deal with, i read 2 books of dr. burns so far(partly the other). So i know about what to say to people to make them feel better, but i don't know how to stop my own behaviour when people get upset about something, or to actually do the stuff i learned.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
What did you learn?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
oh let's see. Like If someone is worried, i would say "i see that you're worried" and then acknowledge their worries, and take it into consideration, while listening to them until they are not as much worried anymore and try a few strategies(i forgot which) to make them feel better.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, that's a start.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Also if someone says to me what is on their mind about something i do, i would say how i feel, rather than attack them, but it's hard to get to the stage of doing it(knowing your feelings). You have to kinda find out what feelings you do have about stuff, before you really know what is the right direction to go, so i guess i must write it all down and see what is on my mind.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
That's exactly what you need to do.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I will try make a form on it, in such a way i can deal with it, and then make myself feel something and then find a way to deal with it, kinda is fun to think about thought situations if i can manage tho.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
You're on the right track.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Can't wait until i get there.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
One step at a time.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I just made a poem.

What is a life without worries? But you cannot let the worries be your life.

Live your life the way you want to, take all input as a peace of mind. There is nothing upsetting you if you stop worrying about who you meet. Live your life how you want it to be, there is nothing stopping you.


What can you do about your feelings? Experience them and let go of it.

What can you do about your thoughts? Learn what they are and what is stopping you from living the life you want.

Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Very good
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I'll try make it the way i want it to look:)
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Very good.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Time to watch tv and relax, i need to deal with some asp stuff later. I can't figure wtf i am doing to make pages :)
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Let me know how it goes.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
What is a good thing to do to exhaust your brain so you cna sleep?
Or what rules is there to fall asleep?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, it really comes down to being sleepy since most of us will fall asleep then. I just know that you can't force yourself to sleep unless you're sleepy to start with.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
What would make one sleepy, as in hormones going to the brain in which activities or food whatever? or what clue is there that will make you tired even if you're overtired?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well being tired and being sleepy aren't the same thing. As far as getting sleepy, most people just do when it's time for them to sleep.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
well i have no routine in it, i have gone past it for years, and i never had a sleeping schedule, so i need to know what will make me sleepy and actually put me to sleep. Being tired does nothing for sleep so, but what will make us fall asleep, isn't it hormones kicking in, if i got adrenaline it will just replace my sleepyness right?
I have never in my life felt sleepy before it has gone a lot of hours after sleep.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
It's not so much hormones as just the brain itself shutting part of itself down like a computer but not a conscious/thinking type of thing. It takes some work to get on a proper sleeping schedule--not taking naps and not oversleeping in the morning.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
yes i mean, that's not it, i can go awake for 2 days, even if i'm tired. I can't just go relax and fall asleep ever. Is melatonin making me resist the melatonin more effectively by drinking coffees to feel not tired? So i can be resistant to melantonin, like if you drink more alcohol you will tolerate it more?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
If you fight the melantonin that has already kicked in for a long while, will you then be trained to keep awake for days?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Didn't understand that one?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
well say i am going for a week with 10 hours of sleep totally. What will this do to you and sleeping? ALso if i'm drinking coffee and eat chocolate and cokes to stay awake even if i'm tired in the morning, what will this do to the melantonin production? Then what would make you feel dousy tired and sleepy, so i can stop the coke from going to my brain and stop me from sleeping?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well the first thing would be not to keep yourself artificially not sleepy with all the stimulants.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
yes ofc, but if i drink 8 glasses of coke sometimes even earlier on teh day, and then want to sleep, it won't work, but what will stop the coke from working, and make me feel tired?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Nothing will stop it from working but time.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
For mild caffeine related sleeplessnes, try a banana or two (potassium), rehydrate with some electrolyte, water, and some good sleep foods such as milk, cheese, rice, and melon. It will take time for high levels of caffeine to "half life" out of your system. Each half life is about 5 hours. If you've pumped yourself with 200mg of caffeine, it will likely take 5-10 hours to half life the dose down to a dietary manageable level including using sleep "friendly" foods. If you end up sleepless all night then use the experience to learn that dietary energy management is easier without caffeine ingestion beyond breakfast.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
hmm so 8 glasses of coke today and i stopped 2 hours ago, but then i ate quite abit of chips, how long will it take until the sugar is stoping me from sleeping, and then how on earth shall i find something that will make me tired? Since it probably would be a problem anyhow heh.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
You don't look for something to make you tired--the body will do that on its own. As for the caffeine and sugar--that takes at least a couple of hours to fade.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
ya i can see that, but there is nothing to make me start melatonin production? Cause i don't think it's starting early enough, even if no coffee or sugar, since i can be tired all day and still not fall asleep.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
It's really not a melatonin problem--you just have never worked on reestablshing your proper sleep cycle.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
ya, i know, but my eyes has to fall asleep, that's the only thing that misses.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I dunno what i gonna do i'm a cokaholic and a chocoholic.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Easy answer--work on breaking those addictions.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
so if i made the rule that i wanted chocolate, chips, cigarettes, coffeine when i'm tired, how do i break the rule and go to bed instead, if this goes for the next morning and i'm sleepy when i wake up, what shall i do about that, also what can i replace the cokes with so i don't have to feel this bad taste from drinking just water, i don't like sour stuff or milk.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
I'd eliminate the caffeine first--the cokes and the chocolate.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
yes thats what i'm saying i can't find something better. Altho it is the reason i don't sleep cause the sleepier i get, the more i want it, like now i just wanna go eat it all the time, cause i wanna rest in body. can you get addicted cause of you need to stay awake?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Why do you feel the need to keep yourself awake when you're sleepy?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
cause i was in need of keeping myself awake when i was at school and workouts and had some fun at nights, since i had only slept 3-7 hours in morning when i was going to school(i slept from 3 to 3 in weekends). Also i was upset by stuff so i didn't fall asleep when i should as i got older(7-20 years). So sometimes i had to stay awake when i was tired(my mom forced me to stay awake when i was going to school and hadn't slept all night).
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
OK but now it's time to work on sleeping at night and being awake during the day,
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
ok so i will take the chocolate tomorrow morning, and now i fall asleep. I dohn't have my melatonin. What do i do instead of chocolate?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
What do you mean instead of chocolate?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
ya like what will make me sleepy, and stop me from crave more? like what will make me feel like i'm going to sleep, and not crave anything but sleep?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
I can't make out what you're referring to here.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
ok how do i tell myself to sleep and actualyl do it, rather than telling myself i can't do it if i told myself i need to do it, i can't.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
First you start by going to sleep whenever in the night you do and getting up at a reasonable time and not taking any naps during the day.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
yes, but i have to fall asleep to do taht.


"I should sleep now"
"I should not be awake"
"I should not eat chocolate '
"I should not smoke"
"I can not sleep now"
"I can not make a date for when I can not keep it"
"I should not smoke, eat chocolate, smoke if I'm going to sleep tonight"
"I should not sleep now, because then I miss something"
"I should not sleep now because you will not wake up at the right time"

What is my problem?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Where are we going with this?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Basically it's all my thoughts stopping me from sleeipng. What do i have to do to fix my thoughts, i don't know what else i can say. What should i tell myself instead? What's rational, why do i do this every time i wanna fix something(timewise).
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
actually all goals is like this, i stop myself.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
When someone is sleepy enough, even thoughts can't get in the way.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
true but that's gonna take me 12 hours. but that's not it, it's the pattern of thinking like this, i cannot say to myself "I should not, cause that's gonna do the qwuite opposite of what i want", also i have to tell myself i can stop doing this, but i don't really know what i am doing to myself causing me to say "i should not".

It's the gruond thoughts, not the actual sleeping that makes me not sleep. Cause this is what makes me a shocoholic, everything that has to do with wanting to reach goals and that i'm not set in my thoughts to find a way to reach them.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, again, no matter the thoughts, we all eventually fall asleep.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
well basically that's not the problem, the thoughts isn't, it is the thoughts leading to the problem to not sleeping, like "i should not do this and that but i do it anyway", leading me to not sleep(like eating chocolate, cause i like it, i smoke cause i like it, i don't wanna sleep cause i rather drink coke, but i still tell myself i should not do this, and this leads to more issues, cause i do not reach my goals by saying i should not, but i reach them by working hard to reach them, i still want my chocolate, and i can't have it in the night when i'm suppose to sleep is what my goal is, but i don't reach it cause i will do the opposite as long as i tell myself "i should not".
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Not at all sure where we're going here.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
like my life is all filled with "should not" sentence, but i will not solve it, as it leaves me frustrated and angry cause i'm not able to. WHy do i keep saying it if it's not gonna solve anything, and why isn't my problem solved?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Keep reading the books--sounds like you were getting somewhere with that.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
yes, btw my bf just told me, my depression and anxiety makes me think that chocolate is greater than life itself. THis is what leads to "i should not" thinking rather than execute harmful thoughts and extinquish the behaviour that supress me.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, things like chocolate ease depression and anxiety, but it certainly isn't greater than life itself.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
It is if you're so depressed it's better to surpress your feelings with chocolate than do something about your feelings.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Exactly.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
well I found this " i would prefer that i do this and that" rather than " I should".
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Yeah--beware the old should'ves and could'ves
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
then give yourself rewards for what you're doing.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Right on.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Well i'm on deep water atm. I am trolling an entire community just cause i am not interested in playing the game with them. They're just abusive trash, i hate how they make me feel, and i don't need them in my life. Well luckily i got the chat removed. Preferably i should just shut the door and leave them behind me.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Good idea.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
question is what have them made me feel.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Write it down.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Ya i should sleep on it, they are making me feel stupid for spending my time with people who don't acknowledge me.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Sleep--great word.
Dr. Chip, Doctor (MD)
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 23668
Experience: Over 20 yrs of Family Practice
Dr. Chip and 2 other Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
now i just need to find out what i'm gonna do to not feel like this anymore. I guess reading the book is a good idea, but will it help me having something to do the rest of my life? I think i need more things to do that i enjoy.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I just workout to get rid of the mind issues leading to body exhaustion. I need to make a plan for my exercises, but right now i just wanna read more and fix things, why is it a problem to my body? is it the not excercising part that made this a problem?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
I thought you did get a fair amount of exercise?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
not enough, i stopped workout when the stomach went crazy. Now i just do it when i remmeber. Haven't bene going to the gym, just to the thursday trainings, it is very stressful to train with others. Well i had a phonecall again, my body was all exhausted, and i crave sugar like never before, it's like i can't teach myself the patterns of "should not eat chocolate". I can't get it in my head. When i read the book i can find excuses to anything.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
How about not having any chocolate or sweet stuff in the house?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
well we just had for easter. But well it's not the major issue. The major issue is how i feel after i been using my mind on stuff regarding my mind health. been reading in the book most of the day and now i feel like a mindwreck and my body is taking it out, so i eat sweets cause i know i shouldn't. Can you help me with a couple of things regarding this book, incase there is something i havent' understood, cause i think that's the case, otherwise i should not feel like this? or is it cause i have been changing things in my mind?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Why does it have to be sweets?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
oh i dunno, it is what i enjoy, i don't like much else and it doesn't require much work, but what can i do about my issues, so i don't have this need?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, that's another very broad question--can we stick to something very specific today?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
how about my defensive attitude when people tell me i did something wrong?
or my selfishness, well sweets is not the problem, all emotions that conflict with my mind is the problem, since i will eat any food if i can't have sweets, i will smoke, i will be destructive in this state.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
I thought you had learned something about how to change the way you thought about what people say and do?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Or do you mean that solving the problem will lead me where i want, like i want sweets cause i'm in a mental state of emotional disorder, thus i need to find out why?

I still don't know how, when i'm exaggerating i forget everything. This is all too overwhelming and too much at once. Reading a book doesn't make you learn it like that.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
You're bouncing all over the place here. What exactly are we trying to focus on?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
well check what i wrote this morning about my "should not" wordings.

Here is what i was working on this morning, trying to find a rational way of my "shout not" wording.

"I sleep now so I get better in the morning, and when I do not have to worry about this more»

"Chocolate causes that I can not sleep, it would be good to stay away from them so close to bedtime, as it will be easier to sleep, chocolate can I eat in the morning."
"Smoking is bad for you, it destroys your sleep even if you want it then you do not"
"You can sleep when you want."
"You can do anything you want, it's not something that stops you from doing things at a time, it's just something you think that sleep makes you not wake up on time"
"Why should you set a goal to not reach it, it makes you want to do, and think later on, goals are met by themselves as long as you do what you want."


Then my bf made me go through the thoughttraps i been reading of, and make me remember it, but i still have problems understand it and actually do something about it, it just leads me to emotional states cause i had read too much on it.

Then i found out i was going ot read about relating and what makes you not express feelings, and what wil make you not listen so that makes more issues that i can't solve yet.

Here is the automatic responses.

"I should sleep now"
"I should not be awake"
"I should not eat chocolate '
"I should not smoke"
"The day when you have to do anything else-if I plan to do something today and tomorrow, I can not sleep now, because I'm not going to sleep tonight"
"I can not make a date for when I can not keep it"
"I can not set myself a goal to reach it because I stop myself from all the goals I will now»
"I should not eat too much calories"
"I should not go to school"
"I should not cry when I want my point of view there»
"I can not say to myself that" I should "because I then do exactly the opposite. Because I am self-critical "
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
OK--and did writing all that help some?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
no, i just got exhausted, cause if i gonna change something it takes so much. I should of done it step by step, like you said about sweets, find out the problem and do something about it, but now i'm so exhausted i can't think straight.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
But you have made a good start with what you've written down so far.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
ok let's see this, if i cut all this into pieces. All in one thinking is stopping me from taking step by step one thing at a time. This leads to should not thinking and a lot of errors at once, what can i do to avoid this. The thing that stops me in communication is mostly emotionell reasoning, and personalisation and blaming. Exaggerating and dramatizing is stopping me from having a rational view.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Let's take it step wise. The chocolate--what are the things you tell yourself that argue against the good, common sense plan you wrote about?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
i am too emotional and tired to think straight, i need it to get through the day. I need to make myself feel better.
I found nothing to do this morning so i had to read this book and learn it, to try find reasons for my behaviour, then i found out, i should not eat the chocolate, but what can i do about my feelings to avoid it.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Well, that's the part where you write down the feelings and why you're feeling them and then write down arguments against the reasons you feel them.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Yes but if the addiction is so storng you can't do it anyway, what do you do?
Or if you feel so hopeless about all your addictions that you can't do anythign about it, the emotional strategies just get too much for anyone especially when it's all this crap i don't wanna have problems with. here is one of the listening problems i got, i don't know what is wrong, if this has anything to do with it? I am too set in my ways.

ten attitudes that prevent you from listening.
1. truth
2. blame
3. victim
4. self-deception
5. defensive posture
6. sensitivity to pressure
7. demands greatness
8 selfishness
9 distrust
10 to help


actually it is the feelings of hopelessness.

Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
So can you identify with any of those on the list?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
i feel too terrible right now, addictions is too big. I just notice my bf didn't make the shop and he has been ignoring me for hours when i said i wanted something.

The ones on list i found was truth, blame, victim, defensive posture, egoism sometimes the help thing.


The worst part is how helpless ifeel tho.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Helpless in what way?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
anything in life, boredom.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
That sounds more like depression.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
anything in life, boredom, the way i feel, irritability over nothing going my way, people not suiting my needs, economical needs not met, not being able to drive, all the people who tells me what to do, my family irritating me.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
The boredom is the one thing you can do something about.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I can't do anything about it, cause i have no interests when i feel beated cause of all this stress i'm causing myself to change myself, same goes for workouts, i just go workout and feel exhausted when i'm done, instead of feeling good. There is too much to do, there is too much to think of, i'm going nuts. I want candy to feel better cause people treats me badly, and cause my thoughts make me think so.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
But you are doing the writing--that's still a good start.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I know this, but it's not going to change my life in a day. i just wanna eat good stuff or do something to nurture myself when i feel like this, why would i feel like this? WHy can't it all just change like that, should i drug myself?
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
Nothing happens in just a day--it takes small steps and quite some time.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Ooo i just found something btw, in the back of the book there is 25 reasons for not doing the selfhelpexercises. This means i don't work properly on them. so if i am dependant on love, perfectionism, anger that's hold backf, feeling hopeless, easy to make me feel pushed, fatalism, fear for blame, inner vs outer expectations, resistance towards structured and fast approach, stamping, eligibilitym, fear for changes, shame, emotional reasoning, lack of control, a depressed perception of reality, resistance to get rid of negative emotions, passification.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
You mean things that might keep you from doing the exercises?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
yes, mainly dependance of love, easy to feel pushed, feeling hopeless do not mean i'm hopeless tho(i forgot about that)(emotional reasoning). Also superwoman is one thing, if you seek help you are weak and worthless(altho i do ask it from my family). THen i have resistance to get rid of negative emotions.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
But still you're going to do the exercises?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
i tried but i fail. if it's not related to me i don't really do them, until i got the perspective.
I wanna do them if they relate to me, i can't really set myself into the other episodes so much, but i read them to see what they are telling me. The problem is i grasped over 10 chapters of the book, and answered the questions before i was reading the exmaples so i messed up a bit, i didn't know what i was answering really.
Expert:  Dr. Chip replied 2 years ago.
So did you go back and do the questions again?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
i did a lot of anger stuff, but the questions wasn't right answered, and i had no more place in book, but well what i didn't read examples of really worked, it was the faults you could make when you think about stuff that made me fail finding what is difference between them even if i read them all when i was doing it.

Then some of them already has an answer so i read it before i could answer.
I guess i can go through and see what is happening, i just lack seeing the overview, and do something about it all if it's not got anything to do with me.
I found it easier to type down the thoughts in excel and work on it, but i fail to read stuff while doing stuff on computer, so i had to get it all learned before i could make the stuff i needed to do. so that means take it slower and learn the basics.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
what you think about this btw? instead of using "I should" then it is preferable to make a choice that is good for you, without being self-critical and it is not something you have to, it's only good for you. Then you will get the reward you deserve. If i make something like this on all the thoughtfails, maybe i will find a way to deal with them and learn them properly?

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