I am sorry to hear of your struggle.
It is likely that this feeling is not related to the forced vomiting. (Although, if this is something that you do on an frequent or even infrequent basis, it is of course associated with the disorder bulimia and it is important that you talk to your doctor about this so that you can be treated)
It is also not possible that you damaged your brain in any way when you forced yourself to vomit. It is possible that you have a brain disorder
It is more likely that this symptom is occurring as a sign of one of several brain disorders which are commonly known as mental illness, and include diagnosis such as schizophrenia and schizoaffective disorder.
Although I agree that it is important to rule out medical problems, once this is done, you must look at the problem realistically. I understand this can be hard to do, because no one wants to believe that they could possibly be developing a mental illness.
You are at the age when mental illness such as schizophrenia do being to show symptoms. It is very frequently the case that it develops in the first years when the young adult is attempting to live on their own and/or attend college. A preoccupation with the thinking process and sensations is common in the early stages.
Of course we could never diagnose you with this chronic illness, just over the internet. There would be many more details to evaluate.
I would recommend that you see a psychiatrist for evaluation and ongoing monitoring.
While in the past, derealization and the other thought disorders that occur along with mental illness were only partially treatable, since the 1990's new medications have been developed that treat these disorders and if taken diligently one can lead a normal life. The biggest problem can be the denial that such a serious illness could be a possibility.
But keeping an open mind and seeking evaluation with a psychiatrist will allow you to be monitored at started on the appropriate medications. If you do this, then you may never experience the most serious symptoms that can occur with these brain illnesses.
You may find these articles helpful in understanding the potential symptoms of developing mental illness. Again, it is too early and not possible over the internet to tell you for sure this is what you have, this is just one possibility, and something that is better to know about and rule out, rather than to wait for a more serious manifestation.
Feel free to write back to me and let me know your thoughts on this. Please do understand if I don't get back to you immediately, I will as soon as possible. (For example my mouse for the computer has stopped working, and I will have to go now to buy a new one, but will be back in an hour or two)
I'm glad you are seeking treatment. A therapist can help you to get your thoughts on other things through techniques. At least this is something that often works for those willing to work at it. If you are interested in reading about these techniques and even starting to practice them. The techniques and other ideas for obssessive thoughts are abut midway down this page:
If this does not work (and it can take some time and practice to give it a good chance to work) there are medications that help with obsessive thoughts.
Feel free to let me know what you think about them.
It could be that the dry heaving was in part due to building anxiety that was already developing. It is unlikely that the dry heaving and pressure caused a condition - but dry heaving is certainly anxiety provoking in of itself. But it is not physiologically possible for the dry heaving to have damaged your brain. If you had passed out and had head trauma and were comatose, then yes this can potentially cause brain damage.....but this still does not normally create derealization, and I don't think you were put into a coma anyway from what you have said.. It is more likely that the anxiety was already building and became intense with the dry heaving. Dry heaving is a very uncomfortable and anxiety provoking experience and now you associate the anxiety, worry, and sensation of derealization with it, because it became noticeable to you at that time.
Have you heard of the behavioral experiments by Pavlov and Skinner in any of your science courses? An example, is the dog that is fed meat when a bell is rung every day for some time. After a while, the dog starts salvitating just when they hear the bell ring, because they associate the bell with the meat. This sort of association occurs easily in the brain. This is why we do experiments and research in order to differentiate between what we may think is the cause of something, from what is actually the facts. What I am trying to explain is that, just because you had anxiety and derealization after the dry heave incident, does not mean the dry heaving was the cause of the problem. Does that make sense?
Great, I'm glad that this makes more sense. Certainly the episode of dry heaving was anxiety provoking and could have excellerated you in perceiving and becoming aware of the derealization.
The main thing is to know that there is help for the anxiety and derealization. Therapy can help you; there are techniques a therapist can teach you and you can also learn helpful techniques by reading the link I provided you. If down the road these techniques are not enough alone, then it may be necessary for you to try medications.
I had an reply prepared but it did not take.
Buspar takes several months to work, in case you were not aware of this.
Inner ear problems have a very specific set of symptoms. The individual looks drunk and spacey, rather than feels drunk and spacey, but this is also not how you had described the sensation you are experiencing before. If you had this, it would be fairly obvious, you would have a sensation that the world outside of you was spinning, and have difficulty walking. This can occur when there is an inflammation of the inner ear or in a condition called BPPV, where a tiny hair follicle inside the fluid-filled tubes called semicircular canals becomes loose. The fluid in the inner ear allows your brain to interpret your body's position. If a piece of the sensory hair breaks loose, this sends the brain confusing messages about your body's position.
It is possible that the sensation you are experiencing is due to stress hormones which are released with anxiety. If so, then it would be helpful for you to do a daily aerobic type of exercise. This helps to use up the excess adrenalin and cortisol that is released with anxiety and stress. You will need to work up to 45 min or an hour, but at least staring with 20 minutes per day of an activity like running, race walking, bicycling, swimming, or rowing might help you tremendously. Additionally, over time as you build up muscles, you will likely have an improved mood. This is because, we now know that muscles have receptors for neurotransmitters like seretonin and endorphens. These are 'feel good' neurotransmitters that help you to feel calm and pain free. Most people no longer have a physically active life, and this in itself can lead to depression and chronic pain.
i def cant run, i tried and it makes the spaciness worse i think but i can do other things.