Great user name? And you should not give up.
It sounds like you have a resistant case of seborrheic dermatitis. The cause of the itching and gooey plaque that forms on your scalp are some overactive sebaceous glands (they produce sebum that normally keeps our skin and hair moisturized) along with a fungal type of infection. Some people develop a severe case of this that is very difficult to get under control. It will manifest with an itchy dense greasy dandruff that is very difficult to remove. However, once you get it under control, keeping it that way should not be too difficult.
The causes of seborrhea are largely unknown. But there are theories that hormone changes can play a part in this. Also there are some medications that may make you more prone to it, as well as some medical conditions.
The key to control of the condition is to remove the plaque that accumulates on your scalp so that medications can reach the scalp. There are different ways to do this, and different products. It may take some time, and continued working with your dermatologist will get the condition under control.
To remove the dense scale, you can apply a mineral oil, or olive oil to your scalp and let it sit for several hours (or, there is a special solution you can get from your doctor to put on overnight). Then shampoo it out with a strong soap or coal tar shampoo. Then you shampoo daily with a special shampoo. Some of these should be left on your scalp for 10-15 minutes before you rinse them out. To keep your hair from being damaged, you can shampoo with a moisturizing shampoo after the seborrhea shampoo. There are also topical solutions to use if you have alot of inflammation involved. These should be used temporarily until the condition is under control. Then daily shampooing should keep it controlled.
Many people make the mistake of not shampooing frequently enough because they think the scalp will dry out and the condition will become worse. But with seborrhea, you need to cleanse daily to remove plaque and to keep it from building up. If it builds up, it gets thick, fungus or yeast gets involved, inflammation develops, and the sebum thats excreted "glues" it all together into a sticky, greasy, itchy layer on your scalp that is difficult to remove.
Since there are a few ways to accomplish this, I am including this link: Treatment of Seborrheic Dermatitis which will put all this together in a "nutshell" for you. You can discuss this with your dermatologist to decide which solutions or shampoos will be good for you. There is a table in the article that lists everything together.
Remember though, you have to remove the plaque first, so that the medications can be effective. There are instructions within the article on how to do this (as I summarized above). Then once controlled, stay on it daily.
Edited by Valarie on 11/2/2009 at 3:42 PM EST