Yes, contacts are out.
Consider this: Pond's Cucumber pads - kept in the refrigerator. Apply these at night and after crying.
Also, try ordering Preparation H that is sold in CANADA. It has a medication in it that is not present in the U.S. brand. It is widely used by make-up artists and even Conan O'Brien on late night TV touts it. The American brand won't help. Of course, don't get the Preparation H in your eye. Get the cream and the ointment when ordering. Use the ointment at night and the cream during the day if you need it.
Using claritin may help the inflammatory effects due to an antihistamine that releases in your body when crying.
Take a look at this interesting article - click the underlined text below:Tears
Apparently it is an autonomous response - which occurs automatically and not within our control. That may be something to consider when trying the antihistamine - if that blocks the chemicals from causing this.
Since this is an adrenaline response, there's no way you can block adrenaline in your system, because that is what keeps our organs and cells to function properly.
If you see a Dermatologist about this, they may be able to prescribe something called Elidel. Elidel would be perfect around the eyelid as a mechanism to reduce inflammation. It is not to be used on a regular basis as a prevention though.
I think this is about all I can offer you right now. I hope the information is helpful - and if you have any more questions regarding this topic, please let me know.