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I am sorry, I believe that I am somewhat confused...... Maybe you can help me... Do you mean, that you are doing this because...either you can not control the layers of muscles surrounding your anus involving the process of evacuating the feces from your body,... You are experiencing a loss of sensation surrounding your anus and the general area involved ...or...you simply enjoy the feeling of having an adult size load of fecal matter squishing around in your under ware?? Have you considered a second opinion with another physician - having a full physical examination to rule out anything medical that might be going on, that the first doctor might have missed? or maybe any other evaluations your doctor may deem necessary considering the importance of what is presently occurring? I am assuming at 21, you have a job that requires you come into contact with the general public at least at some point in time or another, and that this would be somewhat distressing on your part. Are you handling this by taking along an extra set of clothing when you go out or to work?, or are you using adult sized diapers? Do you have a girlfriend that is involved, and what is her reaction to all of this? Being under the care of a qualified physician is very important. If you can not afford one, there are free or reduced priced clinics and support groups that would be more than willing to set back some time for you should you explain your situation. I encourage you to seek one out, and explain what is going on at your earliest convenience. You will be glad you did.
Good Luck to you