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I think this is a being tactless because you are a guest and if you offered it would be one thing, but the fact that you are expected to cook makes it sound like you're hired help, except that you're not getting paid.
With that kind of reception, I would not visit often and if she was really serious, I would take offense.
Obviously, you should go and see your niece but if she asks why you don't visit more often, maybe just tell her that you don't appreciate being told to cook. I'm sure you don't expect her to cook for you as you could go out and eat probably but she shouldn't expect you to cook at her house either.