Family Law Questions? Ask a Family Lawyer Online.
I'm Lucy, and I'd be happy to answer your questions today. I'm sorry to hear about your situation.
Getting treatment can actually help you when it comes to child custody. One of the factors the judge looks at when assigning child custody is whether either parent has a substance abuse problem that directly effects the children's emotional well-being. It's possible the judge would to deny you custody of your children, or only allow supervised visits, until you've completed treatment, so there is no downside to beginning early.
Going to treatment could hinder you in a divorce action if your wife chooses to file for a fault-based ground of habitual drunkenness. But most divorces are no-fault, and you could file for a no fault divorce based on incompatibility of temperament at any time. No fault divorces tend to be cheaper and easier for everyone involved, because proving fault usually requires a trial.
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That's really more of a parenting question than a legal one. Legally, it's unlikely that a judge would hold it against you for taking your children with you to Seattle, at your wife's request, in an effort to keep the family together. Even if a judge things that you made the wrong decision, it would count equally against both of you (if not more against your wife).
Did you have any other questions for a lawyer?