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If the ex won't work with her voluntarily, the she will have to file a formal motion to modify the custody order with the judge who put it in place. She would argue that the child would have more advantages and better opportunities if the move was sanctioned by the court. In any court ordered visitation agreement there is a clause that states that neither parent can take the child out of state without either the other parent's or the court's approval.
So her only recourse is to file the motion to amend the order so that the move could take place. Then it is up to the judge to make any final determination. But as part of that motion she should have a plan as to how exchanges would take place, how they would be facilitated, who meets who where, etc. If she has a skeleton plan for how to make this easy to facilitate, then the judge is much more likely to follow her plan.