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NYFamilyLawyer, Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 577
Experience:  Owner, attorney in private practice, licensed for 36 years as a trial and appellate attorney
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I have a question regarding child support. After four years

Customer Question

I have a question regarding child support. After four years of being divorced, my x-husband is requesting that I supply him with receipts that show how I am spending the money on the children. He is also stating that the money I am given monthly should pay for ALL of their clothing, which means I should purchase clothing to have at his home as well. Is this true?
Submitted: 27 days ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  NYFamilyLawyer replied 27 days ago.

Hello. I’m a family lawyer, former trial lawyer and appellate attorney with 36 years’ experience and also have extensive experience with landlord-tenant issues and other legal issues. I look forward to helping you today.

At the end of our discussion I’m going to ask you to rate me, okay? I’d appreciate it because this is the only way we get credit for our time here today. It is at no extra cost to you.

Please note:This is general information for educational purposes and is not legal advice. No specific course of action is proposed herein, and no attorney-client relationship or privilege is formed by speaking to an attorney on this site. You are advised to retain your own attorney. The attorney herein is licensed in NY only.

If I’m back not here right away, I’m typing my answer. Thanks!

Customer: replied 27 days ago.
ok, Thank you
Expert:  NYFamilyLawyer replied 27 days ago.

This happens from time to time, but providing receipts is not necessary for you to do. The whole idea of child support is to make less paperwork and not create more paperwork -- this is not a fair request and it's unlikely a judge is going to make you do that. You can't possibly do that anyway. I'm sure in the last 4 years you spent all kinds of things on the kids and don't have most of the receipts anymore. It's a ridiculous request but non-custodial parents do it sometimes. No -- you don't have to provide it. It's unduly burdensome so a court will tell him no too.

I can't tell you how many people have fought over the kids' clothes. It's a constant argument. It's so petty, but he's the one who is starting it. This happens a lot. He should have his own clothes for the kids. EACH parent is responsible for supporting the kids by a certain percentage. The child support was figured out the way it was because of what he is earning, your earnings, etc. Tough luck for him, but he has to make sure they have some clothes when they are there. You don't have to buy everything for the kids. This is what it's called to be a parent, and he needs to step up to the plate and do his share besides paying child support. He can buy some clothes and keep them there. He's just giving you a hard time and that's all this is.

Don't let him continue to do this. If he does, you may want to speak with a family attorney in your area, and I can help you find some. Hopefully you can nip this in the bud and tell him no receipts, no clothes, sorry -- that's not what the law says.

Does the help you and answer your question?

Customer: replied 27 days ago.
Well this is what I assumed, but is there anyway to show or prove that child support is paid for things in my household and he needs to provide for his own?
Expert:  NYFamilyLawyer replied 27 days ago.

You have a court order for child support right?

Customer: replied 27 days ago.
Expert:  NYFamilyLawyer replied 27 days ago.

I'll see if I can find a write-up for you. I'll be right back.

Customer: replied 27 days ago.
thank you
Expert:  NYFamilyLawyer replied 27 days ago.

As in my state, there is nothing written in stone on this. It is up to a judge's interpretation.

Here is how it can happen, and maybe you recognize yourself in one of these scenarios:

1) You, the custodial parent, send the kids with a suitcase full of clothes. Dad decides to be a pain and doesn't send the clothes back.

2) You don't send the kids with clothes and he has nothing for them to wear. If you send clothes with them and he will return them, you're better off doing that. If he doesn't return them, then he can buy his own clothes for the kids.

I'd hate to see you go to court over clothing but people do! It's such a waste of money though. It's something you and he should work out. It's not written into statutes, so it's a matter of how states have interpreted it, and they all interpret it the same. They want mom and dad to figure it out between themselves.

So it really depends on how cooperative he is. If they have enough clothes to wear, they can pack a bag and bring it to his house but you have to insist that the clothes come back with them.

Fighting about clothes, on his part, is just his way of trying to get control over you. It's terrible but it happens a lot. See if you can avoid this situation and work it out with him.

The one thing that you do not have to do is provide receipts. He probably just wants to make sure you're not taking expensive vacations to Europe or cruises or something outrageous, although you have the right to take the kids where you want, I'm sure.

Customer: replied 27 days ago.
Ok, thank you. I appreciate the response.
Expert:  NYFamilyLawyer replied 27 days ago.

Does this work for you? Can you work this out with the father so that you don't have to go to court?

Expert:  NYFamilyLawyer replied 27 days ago.

Please let me know if you need any more information, such as where to find an attorney in your area, or anything else related to this question. Id' rather be rated positively and if I didn't answer all of your questions, I'd like to have a chance to make sure that I do. Thanks in advance for rating me. If you need more information, let me know as I’m happy to give it.

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You are also welcome to come back to this room free of charge to ask me a follow-up to this question at any time. Be well and thank you for letting me help you tonight.

Customer: replied 27 days ago.
Ok, thank you.
Expert:  NYFamilyLawyer replied 27 days ago.

You're most welcome. I hope that you can work this out because judges hate dealing with clothing issues but they have to deal with it a lot. I am here for you so if you want to come back at any time for a follow-up question, feel free to do so! Best of luck to you!

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