Thank you for your reply.
Unfortunately, CA does not have pre-printed forms for this like they do for everything else. You have to file a notice of motion, motion and order for release of child custody
jurisdiction in the CA court where the order was entered. Because of you wanting to do this quickly and because you are not in CA, you would need an attorney in CA to file this for you. If the father does not object to CA releasing jurisdiction, you can file this as a joint motion and the attorney can get both of you to sign the motion or affidavits stating that you, the father nor the child have any connections with the state of CA any longer and as such you ask them to release jurisdiction. The order should not take more than 30-60 days, especially if it is a joint motion for the order. If the other parent will not sign to make it a joint motion, then they have 30 days to reply to object and if they do not reply, then your attorney would file for default judgment to get the order.
Either way, this is not complex other than the motions have to be all drafted from scratch and filed by a local attorney in CA and if there are no objections to the motion it should not cost much for the attorney to do in CA, likely less than $1000 or so for his time to draft the pleadings, file them in court and make one court appearance.
However, the VA judge can require that the parties get a release from the CA court of jurisdiction under the UCCJA VA Code 20-146.14. Jurisdiction to modify determination, which states:
Except as otherwise provided in § 20-146.15, a court of this Commonwealth may not modify a child custody determination made by a court of another state unless a court of this Commonwealth has jurisdiction to make an initial determination under subdivision A 1 or A 2 of § 20-146.12 and:
1. The court of the other state determines that it no longer has exclusive, continuing jurisdiction under § 20-146.13 or that a court of this Commonwealth would be a more convenient forum under § 20-146.18; or
2. A court of this Commonwealth or a court of the other state determines that neither the child, the child's parents, nor any person acting as a parent presently reside in the other state.
So, under the UCCJA, based on what you are saying this is why the judge is requiring you to get CA to say they have no interest in the matter. See: http://www.lrcvaw.org/laws/vauccjea.pdf