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Hi! I'm Heather. I've been a practicing attorney for the last 15 years, and I'd be happy to assist you for informational and educational purposes.
Unless there is a court order that states that she must share the car seat and stroller, then she doesn't need to share it. He needs to buy his own for when he takes visits with the child.
If he took her atm card and used it without her permission, I have seen some jurisdictions in which if she files a police report, that the police and prosecutor will file charges for forgery and fraudulent use of the atm card. Some will, some won't. She could consider making a police report. She should also dispute the charge with the bank and let them know that she did not authorize that charge, and that he stole her atm card.
I doubt that a judge will look kindly on him if he stole her money, bought a car, and won't refund the money, or give her the car.
Your suggestion of journaling everything is a very good suggestion.
Has that helped?
I'm sorry she is going through this.