Irreconcilable differences means the spouses no longer get along. It is also known as a "no fault" divorce.
If you and your spouse have been separated for at least 6 months, the court assumes that irreconcilable differences exist and you do not have to prove that you can no longer get along.
You can still get divorced if you and your spouse have been separated for less than 6 months, but you may have to show the judge that you can no longer get along.
You do not need to describe any specific behavior your spouse did to prove irreconcilable differences. So if the intimacy is seen as a sign of reconciliation the court would generally require the waiting period to begin anew, unless for example it was an isolated incident.
The Illinois Code of Civil Procedure specifically grants to any plaintiff (the person who starts a lawsuit) the right to ask the court to voluntarily dismiss all or a part of his/her own petition or motion provided that no hearing or trial has begun. In almost all cases, a plaintiff's motion to dismiss his/her own complaint will be granted without further hearing. A plaintiff makes a motion to voluntarily dismiss his/her own petition by filing a motion and affidavit with the court and sending copies to the defendant (the person being sued )or his/her attorney.
If a trial or hearing has begun, the court can still grant the motion, but the law states that the plaintiff must get the defendant's approval or present a compelling reason/argument to the court. The farther a case has proceeded, the more compelling the reason must be.
In either situation, the plaintiff must pay the "costs" of the action. This could include filing costs, court costs, and even attorney's fees. The judge presiding over the case determines what the appropriate costs/fees are for a case, not your husband. Consequently, the judge may grant your motion to withdraw your divorce petition, but you may have to pay your husband's costs/fees.
Most (but not all) of the time, if the plaintiff (or his/her attorney) does not appear at the first scheduled hearing, the plaintiff's petition or motion will be dismissed. If a trial or hearing has already begun, however, the judge may not dismiss the case and may instead make a ruling on the plaintiff's motion. Even worse, if the defendant is present and he/she has filed an answer or raises a petition or motion of his own, the court could hear the defendant's motion or petition and make a ruling.
The problem, therefore, in not showing up is that you don't know what will happen - your case could be dismissed, it could proceed without you, or even worse, the other side could raise their own motion and you would not be present to defend yourself. One can prevent that by checking the court file after the hearing.
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