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can my husband tell me im not allowed at his dr visits and treatments for cancer
Legally yes, because these are his private health care treatments and as such are confidential between him and his treating doctors unless he chooses to share that information with you. In the same respect, you could prevent him from coming with you to your doctor regarding any treatments or examinations that you might undergo.
A person has a right to privacy in their medical treatments and can't be forced to waive that right to confidentiality.