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Hello I am happy to assist you today.
I am wondering whether your second ex was the one who handled this divorce, and whether you actually participated in the court proceeding? It sounds like maybe not, and maybe he never filed for divorce. Is this possible?
If you can't find records that you need, you would have to go to court and get a court order declaring that you are no longer married. This is not typical. You would have to provide evidence that you were divorced, or maybe even have the former spouses testify (I know that will be tough). That's why that may not be the best option.
The divorce would have to be in the county where either you or he lived at the time, which I see you are already aware. It is strange to me that a background check did not come up with the divorce, but it could be that the county where it happened just doesn't have documents online yet, so that's possible.
I would hate to have to see you go to court to get this straightened out, but that may be the only option if they truly have no record of this.
If you only tried once, I would try with both courts again. It doesn't make any sense that they would both be lost, if you know for sure that there was a divorce decree. I am confident you can get those papers, they can't both be lost. I would try again.