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Dimitry K., Esq.
Dimitry K., Esq., Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 41220
Experience:  I provide family and divorce law advice to my clients in my firm.
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I am the mother of a 3 year old, and currently have a

Customer Question

I am the mother of a 3 year old, and currently have a divorce case. I am from out of this country, and 5 years ago I applied for citizenship through a Finace visa, but my husband is abusive and didn't allow me to get it finalized. Because of the length of time, the immigration court began removal proceedings, but the deportation is stopped because my applications for change in citizenship were accepted a few months ago.
In terms of my divorce, I left my husband before he filed for divorce, and lived at a friends house, like I said, my husband is abusive to me. He refused to let me see my son after I moved out, and threatened me numerous times when I was going to come back to see him. I filed and had a restraining order put out against my husband for myself and my child in May. After I physically had my son I couldn't afford to live in state and I couldn't get any government assistance, so I temporarily moved out of state for several weeks, being destitute and I have friends houses in a neighboring state I could live in with my son for free. No one ever told me I couldn't do this. So he hired a lawyer and had the restraining order removed and had custody of our son changed to him through basically lying, but mostly it seems the judge had major problems that I left the state and he considered me a flight risk. I was given 3x per week supervised visitation and everyday video talking privileges. The judge wrote once I am stabilized living again in the same state to re-petition the court to remove the supervision. Fast forward 4 months, I've been in state for 2 months, with a full time job and a house and bills in my name. My husband only let for see my son in person 3 times in person and 20 times over video during those 4 months. My lawyer filed a contempt request a couple of weeks ago, and the trial was today, but the judge only set stricter visitation rules by setting time frames instead of allowing it to be open. And whats more, the supervised visitation is only allowed in public places for 3 hours.
Is there anything I can do in this situation, anything I can tell my lawyer to do? I've got a problem with all of this, but I hte supervised visitation in a public placxe for 3 hours is crazy. This is going to further hurt my relationship with my son. I feel like what's happened to me hasn't been believed or accepted by the judge, and I'm being treated like a criminal? I also, don't think the judge believes I didn't know I couldn't leave the state when I had full custody of my son. My husband is violating all these court orders, and I don't see him stopping anytime, why would he, he's getting away with this. I even had video and message proof he didn't care about the court order and was willfully violating it. What can I do!?
Thanks
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Dimitry K., Esq. replied 1 year ago.

Thank you for your question. Please permit me to assist you with your concerns.

This is a terrible situation to be in. Why do you believe the judge ruled against you, especially if you were the one who was seeking contempt? What happened?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Sorry for the late response, I have been tangled in this too upset to respond.
My lawyer tells me, the judge is mad because when I filed the original restraining order and I had full custody of my son - what happened was I had gotten out of the house and left the state for 2 months to stay with friends. Then I was pleading with my husband to let me see my 3 year old son (the only child). He refused to let me see him, and started threatening me. I filed a restraining order for myself and my son, it was granted. But I had nothing and I either had to go to a woman's shelter (I've been before and it's awful) or go to my friends parent's house in Illinois - this all happened in Nebraska.
I had talked to the sheriff and someone at the court house, and no one had ever told me I can't leave the state. I was in Illinois for 3 weeks, while trying to figure out how to come back to Nebraska. When I returned to Nebraska for an immigration appointment, I was served a notice to give my son back to the father, because I had become a danger to my son and I was a flight risk. The judge told my lawyer this last trial (the trial was all behind closed doors only) That I violated the law by taking my son away and even though I've now been in Nebraska for 2 months that I am still a risk for taking my son away.
But, when I left I went straight from Nebraska to a house in Illinoiis, and never left that house until I came back to Nebraska. Not like I was fleeing. Also, I became romantically involved with a friend of mine helping me, and currently he is paying for most of this, and here with me.
It seems like everything revolves around that. The previous court order had loose language saying that my husband and I need to work out 3x per week visitation supervised and everyday skype. I video taped my husband talking badly about me while I was skyping with my son, and video'd my son saying bad things to me, like I'm and idiot and not his mommy anymore. And like I had said, the supervised visitation had occurred 1x in 2 months of me being back in Nebraska. My husband having any excuse for me not being able to do it & the supervision was supposed to be a neutral party, but the only 2 people he told me can do it are 2 of his family members. So I accepted, but his family could never do it and the other times he had reasons he couldn't. Finally, I think he ran out of excuses and told me I need to hire a supervisor at $100 a visit to see my son again, and he knows I can't afford having to pay for a supervisor a lawyer already and only scraping by.
This was all submitted to the judge this last trial, video's, messages from my husband denying me to see my son, affidavits from people I know saying I'm a good mother. And this new temp order (which isn't in writing yet) is going to state I can see my son 3x per week 2 hours per visit in a public place. My husband is required to provide the supervisor. No more skype is allowed, but I can make phone calls. I feel like I've been branded a criminal, and now I've been following all the rules, but my husband hasn't and I have less time with my son? Does this make any sense???
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Here is my last court order, the new one isn't here.
Expert:  Dimitry K., Esq. replied 1 year ago.

Hi,

Thank you for your follow-up. Please allow me a bit to review the language and I will respond once I have a more concrete response. Thank you!

Expert:  Dimitry K., Esq. replied 1 year ago.

Hi,

I had a chance to review the order, and it was very important for me to do so. The answer that I will provide will not be favorable, so I ask that you do not blame the messenger. The order is very damning so you have only two options remaining at this point.

First, you can choose to appeal to a higher court. That is very much your right, but I must inform you that the costs are very high and the result uncertain. In general most appeals have a 15% success rate, and an appeal hinges on the fact that the court made an error as far as the law or procedure which affected the outcome, for example in barring evidence that they shouldn't have, or not permitting a witness that you were entitled to have been heard. I do not know if you have enough here to appeal, other than perhaps on how you were painted by the court, but that is your right.

The other option is to comply, keep copious notes, and purely go by the language of the order. Do that long enough and you have a basis later for legitimate contempt if the other party is still denying you your right. But in this case considering this a potential setback is probably best because then you have grounds to move forward.

Sincerely,

Dimitry, Esq.

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