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FamilyAttorney
FamilyAttorney, Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1138
Experience:  Owner, attorney in private practice, appellate attorney, GAL & former trial lawyer, licensed for 37 years
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Im devorced and have custody of my kids their father has

Customer Question

Im devorced and have custody of my kids their father has them every other weekend from Thursday till Sunday . He is currently deployed with the air force and him and his wife think that my kids still have to do every other weekend. I would belive in this case they should have a choice to choose if they want go or stay legally i dont think they should have to go if their father is not there.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  FamilyAttorney replied 1 year ago.

Hello. I’m Ronna, a licensed NY attorney with 35 years’ experience. I specialize in family law cases and appeals. I look forward to helping you today.

If there is a custody order or judgment and the father has them every other weekend Thurs-Sunday, and suddenly he is not there, they don't have to visit if the father isn't there. How long is he deployed for? Is he home on some weekends or is he deployed on a permanent basis for, example, maybe 6 months, a year or more?

Expert:  FamilyAttorney replied 1 year ago.

If he's deployed for a long period of time, you are not going to want to send your children to visit with his wife! I agree, that's not something a court will usually make you do. However, there is an order or judgment in effect and you don't want to violate it. Your best bet, if he is deployed for awhile, is to get the visitation/parenting time schedule modified and change it so that the children aren't going there to visit with his wife. This means you will have to get the court order changed or modified so that every other weekend visits are stopped while he is deployed.

Expert:  FamilyAttorney replied 1 year ago.

A lot of this depends on how long he is deployed for. It isn't really the children's choice, because there is an order or judgment for visitation and you don't want to violate it. You would be well-advised to consult with a local attorney to see if they will bring an action to modify the visitation arrangement. Again, the kids don't have to visit while dad is not there. His wife doesn't have visitation -- he does. Without him there, there is no reason to have visitation, but you can't just ignore the order. You have to try to change it. It could be a small change, such as there is no visitation while the dad is deployed, or it could be a total suspension of visitation until he comes back, and at that time you can work out visitation again.

Expert:  FamilyAttorney replied 1 year ago.

If you have an attorney, I would suggest you consult with your attorney. If you do not have an attorney and want one, see if you can find an attorney who will give you a free consultation so that you don't have to pay for the cost of seeing whether you like the attorney or not. Then you can decide from there if you're hiring the attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, you can bring this yourself. You may want to ask the court clerk for the proper forms so you can do the modification yourself and explain why you want the visitation order modified. Make sure you are specific about how long he is away (as specific as possible), the ages of the children, and that the visitation order would have them visit with his wife while he is away. The court is not going to want the kids to do that unless they are older and want to visit with her. It's not HER visitation -- it's dad's visitation.

Expert:  FamilyAttorney replied 1 year ago.

I am sorry you are going through this but it can be fixed. Most judges will understand that things have changed and that the order needs to be modified in this situation.

I hope this helps and clarifies this for you. If you could, I'd appreciate it if you can rate me when finished. Kindly rate my answer and then submit, as this is how I get credit for my time with you. I work diligently to give you an informative and honest answer.

I thank you in advance for rating me. Please let me know if there is more that I can do to answer your question and if you need more information. If not, I thank you for your rating.

Expert:  FamilyAttorney replied 1 year ago.

Feel free to ask me for additional information if you need it. You can send a follow-up question or message me and I'll be happy to respond.

Sincerely,

Ronna DeLoe

Expert:  FamilyAttorney replied 1 year ago.

Please accept my answer, rate my answer and then submit, as this is how I get credit for my time with you. I work hard to give you a thorough and honest answer. I thank you in advance for rating me. Please let me know if there is more that I can do to answer your question and if you need more information. If not, I thank you for your rating.

Ronna L. DeLoe, Esq.

Expert:  FamilyAttorney replied 1 year ago.

Again, I would appreciate it if you could do the following:

Please accept my answer, rate my answer and then submit, as this is how I get credit for my time with you and with your question. I work hard to give you a thorough and honest answer. I thank you in advance for rating me. Please let me know if there is more that I can do to answer your question and if you need more information. If not, I thank you for your rating. I can't get credit for answering your question without your fair and honest rating.

Thank you!

Ronna DeLoe

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