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socrateaser, Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 38560
Experience:  Retired (mostly)
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I have a pretty complicated question about my rights and am

Customer Question

Hello- I have a pretty complicated question about my rights and am not sure where to turn
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  socrateaser replied 1 year ago.


What's your question?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I do not believe my ex is a fit parent for my kids. I think he is mentally and physically abusive. The problem that I have on my accreditation is I am an alcoholic and got a DUI 17 months ago. Before the DUI I was sober and have been sober since the DUI. I was afraid at the time because I had my kids with me and didn't want them to go into the "system" I have been with my kids and my ex trying to work things out and recently we have stopped trying. I have been able to get in front of his anger with my kids and stop a lot of the spankings and other physical violence but since we are no longer trying to work things out I am scared for my kids. I do not know what to do. I got the DUI but prior to the DUI never had any issues caring for my children, was a work from home mom. Took care of them every single day - all day. I had a relapse and unfortunately that put a huge black mark on my record. I need to figure out how I can make sure my kids aren't neglected and abused.
Expert:  socrateaser replied 1 year ago.

Who currently is the day-to-day caretaker of the children?

Is the current custody/parenting arrangement court ordered?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Custody is 50/50. Yes it is court appointed. We have a daycare provider but since i have been released from jail as a result of my sentence, I have been there basically the whole time.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Would it be better to call?
Expert:  socrateaser replied 1 year ago.

I don't think a phone call is necessary.

If you have 50/50 custody already, then you can ask the court to modify custody in your favor. However, since the court will treat the issue based upon who demonstrates that they are the better day-to-day parent, the issue will boil down to whether or not you can prove that your alcoholism is under control, and that the other parent is in fact engaged in a pattern of abuse with respect to the children. If you cannot prove both factors, then you will be wasting your time.

What are the child(ren)'s ages?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
They are 2 and 3.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I was on random UAs so I can prove I have been sober as I have had 100% negative UAs. I have pictures of brusies on my children.
Expert:  socrateaser replied 1 year ago.

Okay, that's helpful.

The children are too young to have an opinion. That means that the court would have to appoint a custody evaluator to investigate you and your ex, and report on who is the better day-to-day custodian.

Concerning the bruises, I'm assuming that you didn't immediately contact law enforcement to investigate as soon as the children were returned to your care. The point being that you have to be able to tie the injuries back to your ex. Unless you can show the bruises were actually caused by your ex, the pictures will not be given much weight by the court.

If you can prove the connection between your ex and the injuries, then you have an extremely strong case, because the judge must rule as to the better parent, and that would be you.

I hope I've answered your question. Please let me know if you require further clarification. And, please provide a positive feedback rating for my answer -- otherwise, I receive nothing for my efforts in your behalf.

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