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I will answer your question(s). The relationship between you and your bank is contractual. The error they acknowledge would be your basis for a breach of that contract. There is a 4 year statute of limitations(SOL) on contract actions in PA. There is also the possibility the statute could be tolled under the discovery rule. This means that the SOL would begin to run from the date of discovery of the deposit of the check. I am unsure when this was discovered but if it is within last 4 years you could bring an action. Secondly, I am unsure whether you are in divorce proceedings with your Wife. You could, and should, raise a claim for the insurance proceeds as part of our equitable distribution proceedings if this part of the divorce has not been already settled or litigated. You can force Wife to provide a complete accounting of how the funds were utilized and what was paid to who.
I hope this was helpful and I wish you the best of luck.