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Ask Ely Your Own Question
Ely
Ely, Counselor at Law
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 100048
Experience:  Private practice with focus on family, criminal, PI, consumer protection, and business consultation.
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My wife has decided to take summer hospital job in Columbia

Customer Question

My wife has decided to take summer hospital job in Columbia Sc. We live in Wilmington nc. She wants to take our 3 yr old son to MN. And stay with her mom for 12 weeks which I totally do not agree with and want to have him stay here and I can care for him. What can I do to stop her. We are not divorced or seperated at this point.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Ely replied 1 year ago.
Hello and welcome to JustAnswer. Please note:
(A) This is general information and is not legal advice. No specific course of action is proposed herein. No attorney-client relationship or privilege is formed by speaking to an expert on this site. This is repeated in numerous disclaimers throughout the site. By continuing, you confirm that you understand and agree to these terms; and (B) there may be a slight delay between your follow ups and my reply while I am typing out my answer.
I am sorry to hear about this situation. Someone in your situation would have to file for custody/visitation orders.
Without custody orders, either parent can do whatever they want with the child and are expected to work together. This of course often fails, which is why custody orders are now a standard.
EITHER party can file for custody. See here for do-it-yourself information. However, counsel is recommended.
The Court decides on custody based on the rule of thumb of "best interest of the child." This includes, but is not limited to, general stability of the parent, financial stability, indoctrination of the child in the current school and environment, household condition and living condition of the child, other persons living in the house, etc. The courts generally do not like to split the custody 50/50 since this is hard on the child unless both parents agree to this.
One parent usually becomes the custodian and the other parent becomes the "visiting" parent which is generally one day a week, every other weekend, and alternating holidays. The nuanced points of the custody can either be decided by the parties or the Court, if the parties cannot come to an agreement.
Even if a parent does not get managing custody, they are almost guaranteed visitation unless they have a drug problem, alcohol dependency, or an unsafe home environment. Abuse and or neglect of the child or previous children are an almost automatic bar for even visitation, although supervised visitation may be granted by the Court.
Of course, that is the standard order of possession. That order can be modified if both parties agree or if the Court finds that it is an extraordinary situation.
The visiting parent pays child support to the custodian, unless the custodian declines it - see here for an estimate. However, this can be altered if both parties agree to a lesser or higher amount or do not put child support in the orders all-together; the Court will only impose default child support if the parties cannot agree.
Once the custody orders have been filed, it normally takes a few months to get a trial hearing. MEANWHILE, either party can ask for TEMPORARY orders for custody/visitation while the main trial hearing is pending. This may also include a request limiting her RELOCATION or TRIP out of state, unless the Court approves it.
I hope this helps and clarifies. Gentle Reminder: Use the SEND or REPLY button to keep chatting, or please rate when finished. You may always ask follow ups at no charge after rating. Kindly rate my answer as one of the top three faces/stars and then SUBMIT, as this is how I get credit for my time with you. Rating my answer the bottom two faces/stars or failing to submit the rating does not give me credit and reflects poorly on me, even if my answer is correct. I work very hard to formulate an informative and honest answer for you; please reciprocate my good faith.