. Question about spousal refusal to qualify for medicaid? separation
/divorce? What are the ramifications to a husband who signs? If separated or divorced, how does that affect SSI, SSDI and medicaid application and benefits? What are my options?
The background is, I live in NY. I am a husband who has has wanted to be separated/divorced for over a year and have a wife who is unreasonable about discussing possible solutions. The only reason I have stayed around is that I have two children under age 11. The younger one is autistic and goes to special school nearby. I felt I could and would not leave because I provide everything for them. My daily routine for the past 10 years is: I get kids ready for school, take them to school, go to full time job, come home after 7 and cook them dinner, do homework, give baths, put them to bed. I do the laundry, food shopping, doctor's appointments, parent/teacher conferences, playtime at the park. My wife contributed very little to this parenting and household for many years even though she was capable at that time. My spoken intention was to leave/separate but stay in the same neighborhood and still do the same for my kids but have my own quiet place at night. monetarily it was not feasible to keep two households and I never felt comfortable enough that my wife would be able to handle the children. She has rheumatoid arthritis (and will not take traditional medications) and in the last 2 months has become quite incapacitated and has also been hospitalized for severe anemia. As I saw her health deteriorating and after repeated calls to her family that she and I need assistance, her mother
is now helping by living with us. Now wife's family is finally convincing her that she has to apply for disability (which she would never do on her own) and medicaid. The social security caseworker met with us and I explained to her that I have no intention of staying in this marriage
, not because of her illness, but because of other Unresolvable issues. Caseworker presented me with a SPOUSAL REFUSAL - Declaration of Legally Responsible Relative Form. I was told that wife would not qualify for medicaid if I did not sign this form. Medicaid would provide home assistance, physical therapist, nurse visit, etc. I make $70,000 a year. She has not worked in the past 10 years and before that she had some part-time jobs.