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Thank you very much for this information. It is a big help to demystify the legal sides of this situation. It is probably true that it will blow over. I have been very good friends with his girlfriend for 10 years and it is the only reason I have been anywhere near this man. My history with him is fraught with more upheaval.
My friend who was date raped over 20 years ago does not want her husband dragged into anything. She tried telling the date raper "R" over the many years and he wouldn't listen. She sought therapy and was able to find relief and her own transformation without him knowing.
He has a long history of revolving door romances and many accounts of cruel verbal and mental abuse.
I want to do my best to allay his fears, and mine, by sending him a letter letting him know that I will not discuss this with others in exchange for him to do the same, and to do our best to keep our distance and wish him well. Do you think this is a wise way to go? or do nothing trusting it will blow over. If it doesn't blow over and one day I get a TRO from him, that would be very unsettling. Please review these points for me and we can proceed from there. My hunch is to write the letter. Should I send it from an attorney to give it more power? Or a simple one from myself? Should it be notarized? What's the wisest way to send a letter? Also, please know there is no police record of a date rape. My friend chose to deal with it on her own. She did go to the rape clinic and declined the rape kit. Thanks so much.
Okay. Looking at a worst case scenario, what if she is lying, though very sincerely XXXXX XXXXX girlfriends believe her? I think he did, but what if he didn't? From a defamation point of view, what is the worst that could happen to me in a court of law on this matter if the judge decided it wasn't a valid rape? What is the worst that could happen to me if I were sued? Of course, I would immediately comply to keep it all confidential. I have zero assets, but I do have a career in education that is my livelihood.
What are the risks to him for presenting any of these topics to a judge? How much does the law allow one to be charged?
Would I have to pay for a public defender for any court hearings?
I sincerely XXXXX XXXXX do trust it won't come to this, but I want to know the lay of the land.
I think a letter will suffice. Thank you.
Should I save all of my emails with him and two other people who responded about my saying or not saying I had been date raped by him? They would definitely help to clarify the situation, I believe.
Can you review the emails and counsel from there?
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