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There's no "statute of limitations" on this, and the evidence for the third could be used, particularly if there was a fourth (based upon whatever knowledge that you had as to the fourth and from whatever source).
Even if she told you, or someone else, or you witnessed it, etc... That wouldn't be physical evidence as to the affair, but it would still be admissible. But the third could stand on its own, even after you tried to work it out.
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Thanks so much for your answer. Ok, one last clarification then. My evidence is screen shots of conversations on the family computer, as well as emails where she shared the details of the third affair with a friend. She also confessed to me and our joing marriage counselor. I am pretty sure she won't deny them, but I am thinking just in case. I know she would admit it if I threatend to depose the 3rd affair partner (can I do that?).
Yes, you could do that, because that would establish the fact of the affair.
(and as such, would absolutely be relevant)
Thanks so much.