Should I file first - From a legal perspective, it makes little difference who files first. Whether to file first really comes down to whether you believe getting the matter into court more quickly may be helpful. If you believe you have something to gain by getting into court quickly, then file first. As an example, if you believe he should be sending more than "20 - 30K" home, then you might want to file quickly so you can have the judge require him to send more.
Can I stall the divorce - Yes, there are certainly things that can be done to slow the divorce down. For example, you could get fully engaged in financial disclosures and request everything from him. Additionally, you might conduct depositions of all relevant witnesses, you could file multiple motions, you could go to mediation and you could set multiple hearings, all of these things could slow the process. And, of course, him being out of the country may slow things as well.
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What would I be granted based on my information financially? If he admitted to auldtuery(to the courts) does that normally play a part in how much I will get, in TX? Is there a way to make him pay for the divorce since he earns all the money currently?
Allegations of adultery play a nominal role in the divorce action. If one party can prove adultery, then the court might award an increased amount of spousal support and something more in the distribution of property. However, the difference would likely not be terribly significant and, of course, adultery can be difficult to prove.
And yes, it is possible that your spouse would pay your attorneys fees. In general, the burden is needs versus ability to pay. In other words, if you can demonstrate that you have a need for financial assistance and he has the ability to provide that assistance, then you might be awarded attorneys fees.
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