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I am sorry to hear about the trouble you are going through with your ex-wife. In sum, my below detailed advice it to take an "offensive" approach against your ex-wife as opposed to a defensive approach. As I understand the state of thing, you would like to have the ability to have time with your daughter, to raise her and to be her father. Instead of getting to do this, you are spending countless hours and dollars on court, where your wife consistently accuses you of things that are not true. Now, it is time to pick up the pieces and to take a stronger approach. You can do this by presenting your case in a way that no judge can ignore.
Advice Regarding the Biased Judge
If the judge you have been assigned to has a bias, by the way, you should look into getting the judge recused from the case. You can file a Motion to Disqualify or Recuse the Judge, stating the reasons that the judge has a personal bias in the case. You can find templates for this document by putting in Google “Motion to Recuse PDF”. You would file this document with the court prior to the next hearing. The Judge will have a legal obligation to consider the motion and potentially remove himself from the case.
Advice Regarding Not Having a Lawyer
This situation is going to be very difficult to overcome without the help of a good lawyer. The lawyer that you had was disbarred, which means that you likely have not had the help of a good lawyer. A good lawyer can make the difference as to how the court views the case and whether or not you win time back with your daughter. This means, that if you can borrow money, take a personal loan, or sell something in order to have a good lawyer, I suggest you do it. If you cannot get a lawyer, then you can use elance.com to get cheap legal services on a piece by piece basis. You can go on elance and ask for a motion to be written on your behalf, or have other legal documents written, if you have difficulty doing this.
Advice Regarding Taking the Offensive Approach
It is time to put your wife on the offensive in this case. Does she ever make mistakes parenting? Is there any dirt you can dig up and present to the court about her? Any witnesses that can testify as to parenting mistakes, alcohol, drug use, mental abuse, etc? If you do not know of any, could you hire a private investigator to see whether she is doing anything a court would look down upon. You should do what you can to tell the court any deficiencies she has as a parent. Again, a lawyer would be able to help you know what the court would care about in this way, and what does not matter. But, basically, anything that would be against the best interest of the child will matter to the court. In addition to finding this information, you MUST present it in a way that is persuasive and memorable. Creative visual aids, movies, charts, anything to give to the court to prove her deficiencies. That said, if you do hire a new lawyer, find one that will prepare some good visual aids on your behalf. I emphasize this because those visual aids are often what a judge remembers when deciding on a case.
Advice Regarding How to Properly Defend Yourself
Your Wife has accused you of things, so you know what she is going to say at the next hearing. Use this knowledge to get prepared to debunk everything she says. Write out all of the accusations, and write out why they arn’t true. If you have proof that they arn’t true, be prepared to show that proof every time she makes an accusation. If she accuses you of not spending quality time with the child, have a photo album ready to prove that you do. If she accuses you of drinking, have your credit card statements to show you haven’t been to the bar in the last 6 months. (just examples) Have a witness ready to say what you have been up to. In other words, just telling the judge that she is lying will not be enough. You need to prove that you are good dad, and you need to prove she is lying. You need to get creative.
Very Important Tip
Because your lawyer was disbarred, you may be able to buy yourself more time prior to the coming hearing. You can bring a Motion for Continuance, stating that your lawyer was disbarred and you need time to hire a lawyer. This will give you time to save money for an attorney. Again, I know you have decided to go into this without a lawyer, but if you can save the money, it would be a good investment into your future as a father. It is not impossible to go it alone, but your chances are so much better with a good lawyer.
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