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Thank you for your question. Please permit me to assist you with your concerns.This is most definitely a thorny situation. Based on your language I do not see your claims to her as 'blackmail', merely an explanation of rights and obligations. However I will partially disagree with your assessment about rights and obligations.While children are with you, you have a legal duty or obligation to care for this. This duty extends beyond your allotted time or may include it. In essence, if your ex does not return and cannot care for the children, you are required to do so. Giving them to a third party, such as her mother or a babysitter, would be potentially considered neglect and a violation of your obligations (since you are currently caring for the children). She has put you in a position where if you wish to maintain status as a 'fit' and proper parent, you have to continue caring for them, which may mean a cancellation of your trip. When she does return, you will need to return the kids to her.However....Since she , without notice, compelled you to change plans and cost you money, you CAN sue her for the value and costs of the plane tickets and the direct expenses incurred based on her behavior. You likewise can file a 'motion to compel' and request that the courts order her to respectfully XXXXX XXXXX time and not bully you into having the children when you might not be able to do so. You could also in theory demand attorney fees if you file in court since going there was purely due to her behavior.I can understand why you are not happy, and I do not blame you. This is a situation that until and unless you are able to return the children, you retain responsibility in caring for them.Good luck.