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The separation was originated in NY and made part of the divorce decree in Cal
The child is now 43 years old and I think he still lives with his mother. all thought we haven't spoke in years
Abraham,In that case I am failing to see what New York state has to do with this modification. Since this decree was put in place in California, then only California law governs modification, unless the whole venue is changed formally for this case. I can absolutely see why California is ignoring New York modifications, that state had nothing to do with putting the order in place so they cannot be made to modify the conditions. Unless I am misunderstanding something from your facts, or missing something material, California can compel you to file there for any modification or revision, but they really have no need to honor NYS changes. I realize this is likely not what you hoped to hear, but I must be honest based on the facts that you provided.Good luck.