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xavierjd
xavierjd, Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 3400
Experience:  20 yrs exp. in divorce, custody, visitation & support .
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Hi, My husband left me 10 months ago.

Customer Question

Hi, My husband left me 10 months ago. We do not have kids together. He now asked me to leave his condo (bought just before we got legally married). He's a Federal employee and I am unemployed, looking for a job. He plans to file for divorce and ask a court order to expulse me and repossess his condo. I plan to sue him as he tricked me to marry him only because he was convinced I'd win lots of money from my ex-husband with whom I had lots of business asset. My current husband orchestred and handled my divorce and forced me to pay lawyers, expert witness.. The bottom of line, I was expected to get big chunk of money after trial. During the course of these 4 years of legal business battle, mu current husband made me sign and notarize a paper to share 50% of my reward. He still freaked out I could leave without giving him anything, he proposed to me. (I am only realizing this, while after abandoning me , I reviewed my story with him and the chronological facts). We have been married for 4 years, but together since 2006. He lost his job, 1 year after we got married and we also found out the same year we lost the cases and the 2 million expected. He became alcoholic who turned mean and abusive. He finally got a job offer after all this time I have been patient and putting up with struggling and abusive behavior. But the month he got the job, he slammed the door on me and never came back. He started to date with girls 2 weeks after. The month he got the job, the month he also knew he was going to inherit lots of money from his dad who was a notorious attorney and wealthy. Now, after he ruined my life, after I gave up everything I had because I loved him and trusted he loved me for me, he is with his girlfriend, makes more than 130K and expects more than 1M in inheritance. The deal he offers me is simply ridiculous compared to what I lost and been through. I have all the evidence that support my life/story with him. So, my question is : do I need to act now and file a separate complaint against him or should I just wait for him to start it out and then, dispute the divorce and present my case during the proceedings? Is it something I can do during the divorce procedure or is it something I need to file separately? In this case what is it and what do you call it? Thank you very much for your help and detailed answers. XXX . X

Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  xavierjd replied 1 year ago.
Thank you for using JustAnswer.com It will be my pleasure to assist you today.

WOW! It sounds like you have had more than your share of problems! I am very sorry that you find yourself in this situation.

You can either file for divorce first, or wait for him to file. If you wait for him to file, then you won't have to pay the filing fees.

If he files first, and you intend to contest the divorce, you MUST file an Answer to the Complaint. You can also file a Counter-Complaint for Divorce. That way, you are covered in any circumstance. And, you won't have to pay to file your Answer and Counter-Complaint for Divorce.

If you decide to file first, or even if he files first, you can ask that the court enter temporary orders pending the outcome of the divorce. Those temporary orders can include, but not be limited to, a temporary order for spousal support, and order that you be allowed to occupy the marital home until the divorce is final. If he walked out, it is possible that the court will allow you to stay in the home.

Since Washington D.C. is an "equitable distribution" state, the marital property shall be divided in an equitable fashion. Equitable does not mean equal, but rather what is fair. The court will encourage the parties to reach a settlement on property and debt issues otherwise the court will declare the property award.

If you cannot stipulated to a property settlement, the court will distinguish what property is separate and what is marital. Separate property includes, but is not limited to, any property acquired prior to the marriage, gifts, and inheritances. Any property other than separate property will be divided equitably by the court after considering the following factors: (1) the contribution of each spouse to the acquisition of the marital property, including the contribution of each spouse as homemaker; (2) the duration of the marriage; (3) the spouses occupations; (4) the vocational skills of the spouses; (5) the employability of the spouses; (6) the estate, liabilities, and needs of each spouse and the opportunity of each for further acquisition of capital assets and income; (7) the separate property and debts of the spouses; (8) any prior marriage of each spouse; (9) whether the property award is instead of or in addition to alimony; (10) any custodial provisions for the children; (11) the age and health of the spouses; and (12) the amount and sources of income of the spouses. (District of Columbia Code - Title 16 - Chapter 9 - Sections: 910)

Again, I am sorry that you have gone from the frying pan into the fire! You may wish to contact an attorney who specializes in family law. Sometimes, an initial consultation is free or at a minimal cost. You can discuss the specific facts of your case, evaluate your options and decide how to proceed.

Below is a link to the District of Columbia Bar Association attorney referral page.

http://www.dcbar.org/for_the_public/working_with_lawyers/legalAdvice.cfm


My goal is to provide you with excellent service – if you feel you have gotten anything less, please reply back, I am happy to address follow-up questions.

Thank you for your business!

Xavierjd

Many customers have asked how they can specifically direct a question to me in the future. If you specifically want me to assist you in your legal matter, just put "xavierjd” in the subject line and I will gladly pick up the question as soon as I am on-line.

***Answers given are for informational purposes only and are not meant to replace the advice or assistance of an attorney licensed to practice law in your state. If you need any more information, please do not hesitate to ask. Thank you!

xavierjd, Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 3400
Experience: 20 yrs exp. in divorce, custody, visitation & support .
xavierjd and 9 other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Wow, you really are helpful because very thorough in your answers! I am impressed by the quality if your answers.
I appreciate very much how specific you were and not addressing my questions by providing standard response that anyone could find
at the library. Thank you. And yes I would like you to follow up with you if possible.
Soltana
Expert:  xavierjd replied 1 year ago.
Hi Jessie,

Thank you for your kind words. I appreciate them very much.

If you have follow up questions, please ask.

It is my goal to provide you with excellent service.

xavierjd
Expert:  xavierjd replied 1 year ago.
Hi Jessie,

Thank you so much for the "excellent service" rating! It is greatly appreciated and I am glad that you found the information useful.

If you have future questions, you can specifically request me by name as the expert.

Thanks again,

xavierjd

Customer: replied 1 year ago.



Dear Xavierjd,
Thank you again for the excellent information you provided me. Also, I think you totally got the picture of my situation considering the adequate comment you made, sympathizing with me and the experience I am going through. Ok, I understand that, regardless who files first, (and I don't intend to since I don't want to divorce) I still will have the opportunity to file a Counter-Complaint, right? So, will it be something different from what you also mentioned about "answering" to his filing or is it a separate procedure? In other word, is the Counter-Complaint for Divorce a legal action that eventually states the tone of my intentions? Does that imply my intention to go to court and challenge the grounds for divorce? Will it be a separate procedure that I would take on rather than "Answering" his? I understand you advised me see an attorney, but I have all the reasons to be extremely reluctant and willing to documented, research, write and do everything possible on my own after feeding lawyers and expert witness lawyers with my life savings, more than $432K! I have been ripped off and buried alive. So, that is why I am asking information. I have a pretty good idea of what is marital propriety and what is not, but in my case, what I want to show the court is that I have been tricked and abused. I want to sue him not for divorcing me but for having been played in order to benefit financially from me and by marrying me. (Legal advantage). (Simple example: he never wore his wedding ring and never told anyone, not even his family, and we never had a ceremony). So, back to my question: the Counter-Complaint for Divorce I will file, would it allow me to do so? Thank you so much.


 


Optional Information:
Country relating to Question: United States
State (if USA): District of Columbia
What have you tried so far?: Dear Xavierjd, Thank you again for the excellent information you provided me. Also, I think you totally got the picture of my situation considering the adequate comment you made, sympathizing with me and the experience I am going through. Ok, I understand that, regardless who files first, (and I don't intend to since I don't want to divorce) I still will have the opportunity to file a Counter-Complaint, right? So, will it be something different from what you also mentioned about "answering" to his filing or is it a separate procedure? In other word, is the Counter-Complaint for Divorce a legal action that eventually states the tone of my intentions? Does that imply my intention to go to court and challenge the grounds for divorce? Will it be a separate procedure that I would take on rather than "Answering" his? I understand you advised me see an attorney, but I have all the reasons to be extremely reluctant and willing to documented, research, write and do everything possible on my own after feeding lawyers and expert witness lawyers with my life savings, more than $432K! I have been ripped off and buried alive. So, that is why I am asking information. I have a pretty good idea of what is marital propriety and what is not, but in my case, what I want to show the court is that I have been tricked and abused. I want to sue him not for divorcing me but for having been played in order to benefit financially from me and by marrying me. (Legal advantage). (Simple example: he never wore his wedding ring and never told anyone, not even his family, and we never had a ceremony). So, back to my question: the Counter-Complaint for Divorce I will file, would it allow me to do so? Thank you so much. Soltana




Expert:  xavierjd replied 1 year ago.
Hi Soltana,

Thanks again for your kind words. It is obvious from your questions that you are putting a lot of thought into what you should do in the event that your husband files for divorce.

I will attempt to answer your questions in numerical order:

1. If he files, you MUST file an Answer to Complaint if you wish to contest any matters. If you don't file an answer, he may get a default and a default judgment entered against you for failing to file an Answer. Usually you only have between 21 and 28 days, after you have been served with the divorce, to file your Answer. In your Answer, you can contest any of the allegations made in the Complaint for Divorce. It can set the tone for your intentions and can also lay the ground work for the allegations that you will make in your Counter-Complaint.

2. The Counter-Complaint is optional and is a separate document. However, it is usually in a person's best interest to file a Counter-Complaint along with the Answer. This protects your interests. For example, he may indicate that the divorce is "no fault." However, you may wish to claim that there was "fault" that led to the divorce. You can claim that in your Counter-Complaint. And, to your question, the Counter-Complaint sets the tone of your intentions.

3. The Counter-Complaint is NOT a lawsuit in which you sue him for his abuse/trickery. The Counter-Complaint has to do with your divorce. HOWEVER, the abuse/trickery can be an allegation in your Counter-Complaint. Moreover, the abuse/trickery may allow you to get a larger portion of the marital estate. You can also state the other things that your husband did during the marriage that was abusive and what he did to trick you into marrying him and what he did afterwords.

Unfortunately, there is nothing in the law that allows for you to sue him because he didn't wear his wedding ring, tell his family of your marriage or because you didn't have a ceremony. Those are not things that are recognized in the law as a basis for a separate lawsuit. However, you can certainly bring them up in any divorce settlement negotiations.

Below please find a link to the District of Columbia Bar Association page that was developed for persons who want to handle their own divorce. It has links for sample Complaints, Answers and Counter Complaints as well as other documents used in divorce proceedings. I believe that you will find the links and sample forms very useful.

http://www.dcbar.org/for_the_public/legal_information/family/family_court_forms/


I hope you find the information useful.

My goal is to provide you with excellent service – if you feel you have gotten anything less, please reply back, I am happy to address follow-up questions.

Thank you for your business!

Xavierjd

Many customers have asked how they can specifically direct a question to me in the future. If you specifically want me to assist you in your legal matter, just put "xavierjd” in the subject line and I will gladly pick up the question as soon as I am on-line.

***Answers given are for informational purposes only and are not meant to replace the advice or assistance of an attorney licensed to practice law in your state. If you need any more information, please do not hesitate to ask. Thank you!


xavierjd, Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 3400
Experience: 20 yrs exp. in divorce, custody, visitation & support .
xavierjd and 9 other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Expert:  xavierjd replied 1 year ago.
Hi,

Hi!

Thank you so much for the "excellent service" rating and the generous bonus! Both are greatly appreciated and I am glad that you found the information useful.

If you have future questions, you can specifically request me by name as the expert in the subject line.

Thanks again,

xavierjd

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