There should be a Temporary Order of Custody, Support and Visitation that is entered by the Court pending the finalization of the divorce.
Once there is a formalized Order, there will be no need for notes, prior notifications, etc. The dates and times for visitation will be laid out in a Court Order. Such an Order will make it easier for both parties. Further, if one of the parties fails to comply with the Court Orders, the other party may file a Petition that the other party be held in Contempt of Court for failing to comply with the Court Order.
However, you can't force a parent to become a good parent. I say that because there are parents are who are given visitation and then they don't visit the child(ren). The court can't force the parent to visit the child.
But, if the parent w/o custody is not paying support as ordered, or is continually late returning the child(ren), then, again, a Petition for Contempt of Court may be filed against that parent.
You REALLY need to set up an appointment with your attorney and have a "heart to heart" conversation. Either the attorney is going to REPRESENT you, or not! If so, then s/he needs to get on the stick and have Temporary Orders entered. If the other side objects, then there can be a hearing. But in either case, the matter(s) can be resolved and then an Order entered by the Court. Only WRITTEN court orders, signed by the judge, can be enforced.
I hope you find this information useful.
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***Answers given are for informational purposes only and are not meant to replace the advice or assistance of an attorney licensed to practice law in your state. If you need any more information, please do not hesitate to ask. Thank you!