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Law Educator, Esq.
Law Educator, Esq., Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 88588
Experience:  Experienced attorney: Family law, Estate Law, SS Law etc.
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i am being accused of indecency with a child by my son childs

Customer Question

i am being accused of indecency with a child by my son childs mother. I am his grandmother and have been watching him since he was a baby. He goes to church with me twice a week and I have him at least 1 or two other times a week. Sometimes he will jump in the tub with me when im getting out so i can wash his hair hes 4. She s mad at me for some reason she thinks Im trying to get custody of him so instead of telling me she not comforatable with him getting in with me she is emotionally blackmailing me saying she will press charges if I go any were he will be. She has sent text to my husband and son that she knows I would never hurt touch or do anything to him. So my grandchild I have been with at least 4 times a week since he was born I cant see. What should I do
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Alex J. Esq. replied 1 year ago.
Hello. My name is XXXXX XXXXX X will be happy to answer your question.

I am very sorry to hear about this unfortunate situation.

Is the child's mother the only parent with the legal custody of your grandson?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.


My son gets visitation 1 week day and every other weekend. She has three children by three dads and actually not sure he the last one is. She is not with any of the dads and has never worked. My son has been having a hard time with her if he dont do what she wants she holds him from the son. This has all just started since she is mad at us for some reason

Expert:  Alex J. Esq. replied 1 year ago.
Thank you for your follow up.

Did the mother of your grandson made any type of a report against you to the CPS or the Police?

Is she allowing visitation of your grandson with your son and would that be the time that you would spend with your grandson, prior to this issue?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.

no charges yet she is emotionally blackmailing us. She did not give him Tyler sat for his t-ball game and was not at the house she stays at or the other place they said she was. I would have him wed and sun for church and 1-2 other days. and my son would have him thur and every other weekend when she is not mad at him.. She got upset because Tyler always wants to be at our house so two weeks befor this issue she was trying to keep him from us. She said we are trying to take him. She has never worked a day in her life and we all have jobs we are not trying to take him. She is just saying if i go anywere he is she will file charges but i have not done anything to him and she even text she knew i did not. She is just hurting the child

Expert:  Alex J. Esq. replied 1 year ago.
Thank you for your follow up.

Was legal custody and visitation ever established by the court for this minor child?

If it was, what are the terms of custody and visitations that were ordered by the court?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.


Yes my son is suppose to get him thur and every other weekend but when shes mad or if he want give her what she wants she wont let him have him. She gets support from him but she wants him to give her cash when she needs something for him but if he just wants to buy the item he needs she throws a fit. She has always let me have him until a few weeks ago when she got mad at me for I dont know what, so she knew he got in the tub with me so she decided to hold this over my head its a power trip. She is saying I cant watch him play tball but Im one of the coaches. And I teach childrens church on wed so I have to go there but she saying if Im I go around him she will fill a charge against me


 

Expert:  Alex J. Esq. replied 1 year ago.
Thank you for your follow up.

Does the mother have any proof or evidence that your grandson is exposed to seeing you naked or gets in the tub with you while you are naked?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.


She ask tyler if he had had a bath and he said yea I bathed with maws even though she knew I bathed him since he was born she decided this was her weapond. She texted me to back of and go away that i was trying to take her kid but if I dont back off she would file a restraining order against me. That she dont want tyler around my drama or lies but shes the one whos a liar and lately tylers old enough to know this. She said she talked to a officer and he told her to file indencency to a child. My husband contacted her because she told me not to text her back and told her if she was uncomfortable with anything all she had to do was say something that it would never happen again all she had to do is say so. She text him back oh I know she would never do anything but she still would not let him go to church or be around. its just emotional blackmail. She is on a power trip. She thinks we wont to take him but thats not true. She dont even know who the 3rd babys daddy is she has moved them about 7-10 times and has problems getting them to school if If I wanted to do something I would have. Ive lived in the same house 14 years and had the same job 26 years. Im very stable and she is not the kids are getting older and they tell us things shes doing and thats why she is paniced. I wasnt going to say he never jumped in the tub when I was getting out because I wouldnt lie. Hes my grandchild I did not see anything wrong with it I dont think like that

Customer: replied 1 year ago.


She was living with who we thought was the last babys daddy and she would let tyler sleep with her and joe since she first meet him. She pulled alot of crap on that poor guy Joe and he finally got a dna and found out he was not the dad so he is not in the picture. She has been taking tyler around another man named matt and I think she is pulling this because she is worried tyler is going to tell us stuff. He is getting older and he loves us and I think shes jeoulous of how close he is to us. Joes mother had contacted me and she was also mad because I spoke with her. She treatened me then she would keep him from me but it blew over I thought.

Expert:  Alex J. Esq. replied 1 year ago.
Unfortunately, I will have to step away from my computer for the rest of the night, so I will opt-out at no charge and will open your question to other legal professionals.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.


How long will it be to get answer from other lawyer

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Relist: Other.
he never answered and left computer and said he was giving it to someone else
Expert:  Law Educator, Esq. replied 1 year ago.
Thank you for your question. Different expert here as your previous expert opted out. I am sorry for the delay you have experienced.

If the mother will not allow you to see the child and is also violating your son's custody and visitation order with the child, it is your son who is going to have to take the first action. Your son has to file a motion for an order to show cause for contempt of court. As part of your son's filing against her for contempt of court, you will have to file a motion for visitation under the grandparent's rights law.

Unfortunately, the Texas grandparent's rights law has been significantly weakened since the US Supreme Court held in the case of Troxel v. Granville that the parent's right to make decisions for the best interests of their child is a fundamental right. This means that in order for you to get the court to order grandparent's visitation as part of your son's visitation, you would need to prove (as you said above) the extensive relationship with the child since the birth of the child such that relationship should be continued in the best interests of the child.

Generally, in a situation like you describe, especially with multiple baby daddies, the court is going to seek to allow the child visitation in an actual stable home and if you prove the continuous relationship with the child, this will be all the court needs to grant you such visitation.

One word of caution, the child is now approaching the age where bathing with you is becoming inappropriate, so that behavior is going to have to cease. There is no set age in the law for this and child protection in their investigations looks for intent and harm as well as the cognitive ability of the child and once the child begins to get to the point where they begin to develop their cognitive skills, 4-5 years old, that is when bathing or showering with adults needs to come to an end. This is not saying you cannot bathe the child, but being in the tub or shower with the child (unless you are in there with a bathing suit on of course) is going to at the very least raise the eyebrows of child protection if she were to make such a complaint. However, to try to ease your worry, if this is all she is accusing you of, this type of allegation almost always ends up unfounded and dismissed by child protection (the problem is not that you can face being charged with any abuse, it is that even an unfounded child abuse complaint can go on your CPS record and there is no removal process from a child protection agency record).




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Customer: replied 1 year ago.

I will no longer let my grandchild even be in my room or bathroom when Im in there. I just know the mother knows I would never touch or harm him and I understand if she feels its not ok then just say something to me. This is just not the real issue she has other issues. So she wants to use it to blackmail me. She has been threatning me with filing charges and thats why I wanted to know if bathing with him was illegal because she would be a liar if she states anything else

Expert:  Law Educator, Esq. replied 1 year ago.
Thank you for your response.

I believe that the daughter and everyone else knows you would never touch or harm this child, but the fact is she is manipulative and vindictive and this is her way of exercising those traits. Thus, you have to go to court to force a visitation order and enforcement of that order.

Bathing him is not illegal, not at all. Like I said, the only thing that would be "questionable" not necessarily illegal, would be if you were in the tub or shower with the child. Nudity is not actually illegal in front of a child either, as there are plenty of nudist colonies and resorts where adults and children attend, so that would not be found as abuse by the courts either as it is not against the law. She is just doing this to hurt you.
Law Educator, Esq., Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 88588
Experience: Experienced attorney: Family law, Estate Law, SS Law etc.
Law Educator, Esq. and 10 other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 1 year ago.

I was just making sure because she is telling my son that she is going to not let him go to his tball game and I believe she is a little crazy and has threated me if i show up at the game she will have the cops there. She said she will file charges on me and fix me real quick.

Expert:  Law Educator, Esq. replied 1 year ago.
Thank you for your follow up.

She can try to make trouble, but she will have to make up facts and lie about what you did for there to be any violation of law based on what you have said above.

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