Good afternoon Lisa,
I'm Doug, and I'm very sorry to hear of your situation.
Yes, you can force him to either sell the house or to buy you out. But you must go through the court to do this, which will occur in your divorce. Short of a divorce proceeding, you can not force the sale of the property, or force him to pay you your share of the value of the property. You will also almost certainly be eligible for spousal support from him.
You will want to first file for divorce. After doing that, you will want to ask the court to set what is known as a Temporary Hearing. A temporary hearing is a court proceeding held soon after the filing of a divorce action and allows the parties to ask the court to issue orders affecting the other party that will remain in effect, typically until at least the time of the divorce decree.
At that hearing you may ask the judge to order that your spouse pay you spousal support/alimony, until at least the entry of the divorce decree.
This is a very critical hearing to ask for. This hearing is not automatic, and if your do not request it, it may never be held. Another important thing to consider is having a local Family Law attorney assist you at this hearing. What occurs at the Temporary Hearing often signals what will happen after the divorce, as regards XXXXX XXXXX to spousal support.
Based on the number of years you have been married, and based on the presumed difference in your respective incomes, it is likely that you will qualify for a alimony, for at least a number of years.
Issues the court will generally look at in determining alimony include:
1.The present respective incomes of the parties;
2.The education levels and earning capacities of the parties;
3.The ages and the physical, mental and emotional conditions of the parties;
4.The duration of the marriage;
5. Whether either party will be caring for children of the marriage;
6. The standard of living established during the marriage.
While the amount of alimony you might be awarded can be virtually impossible to determine based on the facts you have provided, when alimony is awarded in similar situations it generally amounts to 15% to 25% of the higher earning spouse's income. The duration of alimony often runs approximately 50% the number of years of the marriage. In long term marriages of 10 years and longer, alimony can be made permanent by the court---terminating usually on the remarriage of the receiving party or upon their cohabitation with a new partner.
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I wish you the best in 2013,