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Barrister
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I have court ordered custody agreement. I have the primary

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I have court ordered custody agreement. I have the primary physical custody and my ex-wife is the secondary. I have the kids from Friday 9:00 pm till Wednesday morning. My ex has kids from Wednesday afternoon, pick up kids from school, till Friday 9:00 pm.
To my understanding, that means my ex-wife must pick up kids from school on Wednesday and keep kids till Friday 9:00 pm. She is responsible for picking up and caring for kids during those times. And I'm responsible for kids during my time. If she cannot pick up or care for kids during her visitations, then it is her responsibility to find a daycare or someone to have care and pick up kids during her times according to the custody agreement.
If she cannot pick up kids, then she must give me a first option to refuse. If I refuse to pick up and care for kids during her visitation then she must find someone else to pick up kids and care for them during her visitation days according to the custody agreement.
Even though her visitation is from Wednesday after school till Friday 9:00 p.m. every week, she picks up kids on Thursday and drop them off on Friday 9:00 pm or pick up kids on Friday after school and drop them off 5 hours later. She is picking whatever time she wants to pick up kids and whatever time she wants to drop them off. She is only using partially days of her visitation and not taking responsibility for all her visitations days.
Because of that, I and my kids have to be ready and be waiting for her to show up whenever. I just cannot put my life on hold for her anymore. Since she said she could not pick up kids or make other arrangements to pick up and care for kids on Wednesday of her visitation, I did not let her see kids that week because she forfeited her visitation when she didn’t pick up kids. Now she is threatening to call police if I do not let her pick up kids out of sequence whenever she wants to. Did I do something wrong for holding kids when she failed to pick up kids on her day of visitation, Wednesday and/or Thursday?
Following are pertaining paragraphs from the custody agreement:
- Both parents agree children will spend time with Mother every Wednesday and Thursday overnight from pick up from school Wednesday until drop off at Father’s residence at 9:00 pm Friday.
- Changes/Cancellations: Parents agree to notify each other at least 24 hours prior to a proposed change in the regular schedule and at least 36 hours prior to a proposed change in the holiday/summer schedule.
- The parents understand that they may make changes to the schedule as well as arrange for additional time provided the changes are by mutual consent. In the event that they do not both agree to any changes this schedule will remain in place.
- The parents agree that if they are not able to care for children overnight during their designated time, they will offer the other parent the right of the first refusal. If the other parent is not able to assume this care, it is the designated parent’s responsibility to provide alternate suitable care. The parents agree if the requesting party does not receive a response or a definitive answer within 48 hours of the request, they may choose an alternate caregiver.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Barrister replied 2 years ago.
Hello,
.
Did I do something wrong for holding kids when she failed to pick up kids on her day of visitation, Wednesday and/or Thursday?
.
No, you did not commit any violation of the agreement by keeping the kids. If she is unable to coply with the order or make alternate arrangements for the children's care, then you would be well within your rights to deny her visitation. The court order sets specific times and days for her visitation. It does not give her a range of times she can simply choose to see them if she wants. They are set with repercussions if she does not comply.
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Since she is not notifying you at least 36 hours in advance of any changes, then you would be under no obligation to honor her requests for visitation whenever she got around to seeing them.
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If she were to contact the police regarding this, they would likely tell her that this is a civil matter and she needs to take it up in the family court that put the order in place if she is not happy with it.
.

.

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Thanks.

Barrister

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Please remember to rate my answer. I will gladly continue our discussion until you have gotten the information you need.

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If you need further help, just reply to me via the “REPLY” or “CONTINUE CONVERSATION” button.

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Please keep in mind that I am trying to help you understand and resolve your situation. I don't make the laws, I am just reporting or interpreting them, so the outcome may not be what you had hoped for.

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Please be patient as I am typically working with several customers at any given time. Some answers take 5 minutes, some 35 minutes. But rest assured, I will get back to you.

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I am not entering into an attorney client relationship, this is a public forum, and all posts are available for public viewing. There is no duty of confidentiality that attaches to any posts. With that in mind, do not post any specific information you do not want available for public viewing. The information provided is not a substitute for a local attorney’s legal advice.

Customer: replied 2 years ago.

If she gives me 24 hrs advance notification saying that she cannot pick up kids on first day of her visitation and wants to pick them up 1 or 2 days later and I refuse her request for whatever reason, then can I deny her the visitation for that week?

Expert:  Barrister replied 2 years ago.
Well, that depends on whether you want to modify your schedule to try to accomodate hers. If you don't, then as it states, the fixed schedule stays in place and if she can't meet it, you are under no obligation to abide by it that week since she has violated the terms.
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Basically parent A can't just keep parent B hanging or expect them to change their schedules whenever it suits parent A. So if you don't agree with her requests to modify, then you can tell her that she either picks up the kids Wed afternoon to Fri evening or she can't have them at all.
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She would then have to file a motion in the family court to complain but the judge would immediately ask her why she isn't abiding by the schedule that s/he put in place. Then the judge will likely tell her that she can't violate the order when she wants to and then cry foul when you refuse to dance to her tune.
.

.

.

Thanks.

Barrister

.

Please remember to rate my answer. I will gladly continue our discussion until you have gotten the information you need.

.

If you need further help, just reply to me via the “REPLY” or “CONTINUE CONVERSATION” button.

.

Please keep in mind that I am trying to help you understand and resolve your situation. I don't make the laws, I am just reporting or interpreting them, so the outcome may not be what you had hoped for.

.
Please be patient as I am typically working with several customers at any given time. Some answers take 5 minutes, some 35 minutes. But rest assured, I will get back to you.

.

I am not entering into an attorney client relationship, this is a public forum, and all posts are available for public viewing. There is no duty of confidentiality that attaches to any posts. With that in mind, do not post any specific information you do not want available for public viewing. The information provided is not a substitute for a local attorney’s legal advice.

Barrister, Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 24627
Experience: Attorney with 14 years experience
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