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my wife and i have agreed to divorce. when she left and we

 
LADY LAWYER's Avatar
  • Answered by:LADY LAWYER
  • Family Law Attorney
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my wife and i have agreed to divorce. when she left and we last spoke i let her mother take ella and since then i have heard nothing from her if child or she is well. she also has the family van i bought that is in may name alone. i have papers filled out for divorce already. i want to go and try to retrieve child but am unsure if that is legal?
can u please fill me in on some advice and understanding

 

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State/Country relating to question: California

Already Tried:
i have tried several texs messages a day nice and polite to please answer about our child and the vacation i am supposed to take with her in 2 weeks. her parents her friends will not answer phone.

Submitted: 296 days and 21 hours ago.
Category: Family Law
Value: $58
Status: CLOSED

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Expert:  LADY LAWYER replied 296 days and 21 hours ago.


LADY LAWYER : Hello, Thanks for choosing Justanswer.com! I look forward to helping you today.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

hello

LADY LAWYER : The site has just changed its rating policy and some customers are finishing it difficult and end up rating the people that are helping them poorly or just "okay" which is causing them not to get paid and to even lose their jobs on the site. So until this ratings issue is resolved, I just wanted to be clear that I will help you for as long as you should need it on any questions you have. All I ask is for a positive rating at the end.
LADY LAWYER : Does that suit you okay and would you like to continue?
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

ok i will rate u when we are done and i look forward to positive answers lol

LADY LAWYER : Thanks. I will give you the correct information under the law. :)
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

i will give u good rating

LADY LAWYER : As long as you and your wife are still married and there is no court order stating otherwise, you have equal rights to your daughter.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

so have u ready my question already what do u know of this?

LADY LAWYER : So you may go get your daughter and it would not be illegal.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

ok equal rights i dont really even know where to find her possibly and hour drive away in lodi

JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

what if she trys to dispute?

LADY LAWYER : Now, if your wife freaks out and there is a breach of the peace and she calls the cops, the cops will probably tell you to leave and that you need to take this matter up with the judge.
LADY LAWYER : I did not realize you did not know her whereabouts.
LADY LAWYER : That would be a problem and you may have to hire a private detective to find her.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

and even though she dosent have a job and is staying in small apartments between family members i have an apartment that could suit my child and i have a job and for last 3 yrs have been only job holder. we have only been married 8 mnths

JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

i have an idea where she is but am affraid of consiquences. there was never any Physical Abuse but i am unsure of family members

LADY LAWYER : I think you need to go ahead and file for divorce and ask for custody of your child. It sounds like it would be in the child's best interest to be with you. That is what the court will look for.
LADY LAWYER : I understand. That is why the best way to handle this is to go ahead and file do divorce and then ask for custody.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

even though its a 50 50 state in ca? i have tried i sent her check for 600 dollars and even agreed to sign up for an apartment with my income

LADY LAWYER : When you have a court order saying you are entitled to custody or at last visitation, then neither her nor her family can do anything about it and the cops have to honor that too.
LADY LAWYER : 50/50 refers to property division, not child custody.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

so when i file and they ask how many for fee waiver do i claim just my house all her other 2 kids and ours

LADY LAWYER : While CA does prefer Joint Custody, the court always goes by what is in the Best Interest of the Child.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

i want her to see her family there i just want co operation but i have the right to go get her? then and i shouldnt fear it

LADY LAWYER : Do you plan to support her other two kids that are not yours? Because unless you have legally adopted them, you are not obligated to do so.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

no no i do not for the last 6 mnths i also supported her ex husband to be with his kids. and i miss them but am truly only concerned for my child thats why i am willing to contribute

JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

but on my taxes last year i claimed 5

LADY LAWYER : Let me be very clear. Legally, you have equal rights to your child while you are still married. But if she calls the cops if you go try to get your daughter, then the cops are probably going to ask to see a court order saying you have a right to get your daughter. They are not going to arrest you for kidnapping or anything, but they may tell you to go to court and to leave the child with her mother in the meantime. Cops are not always great at knowing the actual laws and they are mainly going to try to keep the peace.
LADY LAWYER : If you are looking for the fee waiver, then I would claim whatever kids you were able to claim on your taxes.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

ok what happens if i go by court tommrrow and get divorce papers started and then make the venture the rest of the way to her possible ressidence

JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

i know ther is service to be done and all but do that affect anything>?

JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :
LADY LAWYER : You are not going to get anything from court the same day you file. You will have to have a herring first and the judge will at least issue you an order saying you have the right to see your daughter.
LADY LAWYER : No, it would not affect anything. You could file and then go try to see her.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

ok very good. is there a way to see if she has possibly already filed and i just havent found out yet?

LADY LAWYER : You could always tell her you won't be giving her any money unless she lets you see your daughter. Because right now, you are not obligated to pay for anything.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

whats my rights to the van? anything? i cant stop paying it will mess up my recovering credit

LADY LAWYER : You can call the clerk of court in the county she is living in and ask them to look it up by your names. You can also check with the clerk in your county, if it is different from hers.
LADY LAWYER : Do you have another vehicle?
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

is there a website u may know of free?

JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

i have my scion i paid off this year thats my vehicle

LADY LAWYER : You can check on the county clerk's websites. Sometimes you can look things up there but otherwise you will have to call them.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

so under this free trial i can come back a coupple more times to find answers?

LADY LAWYER : Okay. Most likely, the cout will give you one vehicle and her one vehicle. But If you want to get the van back, then BEFORE you file for divorce, you can have it repossessed from her as long as it is in your name.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

it is in my name only

LADY LAWYER : Oh sorry, I thought you were asking about whether you could look up the divorce info online for free.
LADY LAWYER : Yes, if you have a free trial on this site, you can come back for free to ask more questions.
LADY LAWYER : I also let any of my customers that give me a positive rating to come back and ask me follow up questions on their original question thread free of charge.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

no i was sorry i am a whirl of thoughts. i have really enjoyed being able to type to some one who answered my questions as well as u have. and then i ahd a random thought

JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

thats awesome i will deffinatly give u postive ratings

LADY LAWYER : Lol. No worries! Happy to help!
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

so how would i find u again? do u send me an email or link?

LADY LAWYER : Thank you so much. I have worked for this site for 5 years helping awesome people like you and now this rating system really has me worried. You just sign back on to this site, go to the "my questions" link and then click on this question. Then you can reply and ask me anything you want.
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

welll lady lawyer u r doin great i may be back soon with up dated questions lol ty again u earned my money!

LADY LAWYER : Great! Look forward to hearing from you soon. I am online every day but Sunday so if I don't happen to be on when y reply to me, I should be back with y within 24 hours.
LADY LAWYER : *you
JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :

awesome ty ttyl

JACUSTOMER-5k5wtxw2- :
LADY LAWYER : Thank you kindly!

Expert TypeFamily Law Attorney
Category: Family Law
Pos. Feedback: 99.2 %
Accepts: 1634
Answered: 7/6/2012

Experience: Family Law Attorney

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