MY husband has been an alochic for as long as i have known him 17 years . we got married 7 years ago, he is always cuting me down.... He starts drinking at 9 or 10.00 in the MORNING and drinks all day and night everyday.... I know he is in denial.. he says he is a social drinker, he drinks with know one.... His achohol is his BUDDYS... WE have a son who is 15 years old..... he is driving me CRAZY..... I tell him he has to qwit because he is killing himself.... Thier is mental abuse now.. He has phyicaly abused until i had him put in jail... my son son has seen all of this.... Its getting to where i hate him as a person, I also PRAY for him because this is his weakness... He owns his own buiness... so he is a functional alochlic......And tells me i dont give anything to this family all though i riased his child since she was 3 years old she is now 20. I also know that he is using his children to be on his side or he will not give them any money, cars, ect.... i have always kept a clean house, laundry, mow the yard... he calls me a loser.... I am wanting a divorce but i am afraid of losing my 15 year old son....help..
State/Country relating to question: Illinois
I tell him that he is in denial and needs help . He will not listen to anything i tell him , so we just have stopped talking until at night when he yells n screams at me sometimes for hours... so i try to ingnore him..
Hello and welcome,I am very sorry to hear of your difficult situation.Are you the primary caregiver for your son?Would your son choose to live with you or his father if he had to choose?
He is confused he nows where the money is, is with his dad... But i know that he loves me very much..... We have talked about his dad`s problem.. He also knows that he his trying to buy his love.. If we got a divorce i told him that he might have to talk to the judge alone... and i told him to just tell the truth.
I see.Because of his age, your son's wishes to live with one parent or the other would be given more weight typically. So if he indicates a desire to live with his father, a court may grant that wish. So, there is a risk in filing for divorce, but it sounds as though you need to pursue that option, or at least a legal separation, for your own well-being.You should also seek spousal support/alimony since your husband is the primary financial provider for the family. If you did obtain custody of your son, then the father would normally be ordered to pay child support as well.There are women's resource centers in many areas that aid women in leaving abusive relationships and regaining their financial independence. I would look for a center in your area and take advantage of any assistance they can provide.
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JD, 15 years experience including family law
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