My Boyfriend is going through child custody in NYS. We have kept our relationship quiet from his X Girlfriend and to keep court proceedings going as smoothly as possible. His daughter is 10years old and I love her very much and she loves me. My Boyfriend and I decided it wasn't fair that our lives together had to be kept a secret and it should have no effect on custody issues. He and his X had gone to mediation and were working on a schedule. One weekend he had her I took his daughter for a few hours to a horse farm and she rode for an hour then we went back home and had dinner and watched a movie. We all had such a wonderful weekend. When she got home to her mother's she told her mother all about it. She has refused viaitation rights since then and is now petitioning the court to give him only supervised visitation and I can never be around his daughter. Please tell me if she can do this. I love this little girl and would never hurt her. My Boyfriend is one who teaches his daughter the world is not made up of lollipops and cottoncandy. She asked him why my X husband and I broke up and he was honest w/ her and told her that he attempted to rape me and he physically abused me. His X girlfriend is using this stating it is harmful to their daughter. He asked his dauggter if ahe knew what rape was and she did and explained it to him. This is a very mature girl for her age, very well rounded and confident thanks to the way her father has raised her. She knows there are bad people iut there and knows exactly what to do if in a situation she feels is dangerous. How can he be punished for this. His daughter is his life and this woman is using her daughter to try to get him to break ip with me. Please help me. Any advise would help.
State/Country relating to question: New York
My BF has provided supporting research to his attorney which supports the way he communicates with his daughter and the values which he teaches her.
Hello and thank you for the opportunity to assist you. There might be a slight delay between your follow ups and my replies as I am typing out my answer, or taking a quick break. Please remember that this is general information only, not legal advice, and no attorney-client relationship is formed.I am sorry for your situation. Honestly, I highly doubt that she would be successful. Do not confuse her filing this action with the assertion that she would be successful. Anyone can file anything. In order to modify a custody agreement, a party has to prove two things:1) A change of circumstances to justify a modification of the custodial arrangement as determined by the Court which was best for this child (MATTER OF EBERT v. Ebert, 38 NY 2d 700 - NY: Court of Appeals 1976); and2) That the modification is "in the Best Interest of the Child." Id.She has to show that the child has been seriously affected by your presence. However, you are not a druggie, or a dangerous individual, etc. The boyfriend cannot hide you forever from her not is her expected to. Unless she makes you out as a person that is mentally or physically hurting the child, the Judge is unlikely to allow such a modification, and see this simply as a jealous reaction on behalf of the ex. This happens much more often than you think.Nonetheless, it is a good idea to retain counsel because she will likely try to spin everything to reflect her argument more.I hope this finds you well. Please remember that I do not get credit for my time with you unless the answer is rated/concluded by you; I work very hard to formulate an informative answer for you – please reciprocate my good faith. If you still need information, hit reply so we can chat until you are satisfied. You may always come back to it to ask follow ups on this topic free of charge.
Thank you Ely, are there court cases I can review from NYS family law?
Hello,There are plenty of court cases and precedent, one of which I had mentioned above.Also note:Any court in considering questions of child custody must make every effort to determine "what is for the best interest of the child, and what will best promote its welfare and happiness". (Domestic Relations Law, § 70; Matter of Ebert v Ebert, 38 N.Y.2d 700, 702; Obey v Degling, 37 N.Y.2d 768, 769; Matter of Lincoln v Lincoln, 24 N.Y.2d 270; Bistany v Bistany, 66 AD2d 1026; Sandman v Sandman, 64 AD2d 698, mot for lv to app den 46 N.Y.2d 705; Matter of Saunders v Saunders, 60 AD2d 701.). As we have recently stated, there are no absolutes in making these determinations; rather, there are policies designed not to bind the courts, but to guide them in determining what is in the best interests of the child. (Friederwitzer v Friederwitzer, 55 N.Y.2d 89, 93-95.)I hope this finds you well. Please remember that I do not get credit for my time with you unless the answer is rated/concluded by you; I work very hard to formulate an informative answer for you – please reciprocate my good faith. If you still need information, hit reply so we can chat until you are satisfied. You may always come back to it to ask follow ups on this topic free of charge.
Private practice with focus on family, criminal, PI, consumer protection, and business consultation.
DISCLAIMER: Answers from Experts on JustAnswer are not substitutes for the advice of an attorney. JustAnswer is a public forum and questions and responses are not private or confidential or protected by the attorney-client privilege. The Expert above is not your attorney, and the response above is not legal advice. You should not read this response to propose specific action or address specific circumstances, but only to give you a sense of general principles of law that might affect the situation you describe. Application of these general principles to particular circumstances must be done by a lawyer who has spoken with you in confidence, learned all relevant information, and explored various options. Before acting on these general principles, you should hire a lawyer licensed to practice law in the jurisdiction to which your question pertains.
The responses above are from individual Experts, not JustAnswer. The site and services are provided “as is”. To view the verified credential of an Expert, click on the “Verified” symbol in the Expert’s profile. This site is not for emergency questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals. Please carefully read the Terms of Service (last updated February 8, 2012).