I'm sorry to hear of the situation.
Short of actually proving
the mother unfit, and convincing that court that her parental rights
should be terminated, there simply is no chance that you and your husband will ever have full custody of the child.
Your situation is really not rare in the least---in fact it is quite common.
Your husband is the natural and legal father
of the child---that is his legal designation.
He is obligated to support the child, and he is entitled to the right to assist in the raising of his child---as is the mother. he is entitled to reasonable visitation with the child, and if he can convince the court that it is the child's best interest to primarily reside with him, and yourself, then the court may grant that. However, you can never expect that the court will award sole custody
to him simply because the two of you may want it that way. The court will only order what is in the best interest of the child
---and keeping in mind the constitutional rights of each parent
to participate in the raising of their child.
I wish you the best in 2012.
I understand that you may be disappointed by the Answer you received, as it was not particularly favorable to your situation, nor was it what I sensed you were hoping to hear. Had I been able to provide an Answer which might have given you a successful legal outcome, it would have been my pleasure to do so.