I know you stated there was very little money to proceed but it may be worth it to try and find a lawyer to assist. You may have to call around a lot to find an attorney that is reasonable for the fee, but the 401K may be worth quite a bit after all of the years. The terms of the Divorce Decree will control which one is correct.
If she absolutely cannot afford an attorney...she may want to at least try and see if she can get a free consultation. Even a consultation may be pretty beneficial and quite helpful.
However, an attorney is not required. If your sister proceeds on her own, generally a good place to start is by contacting the Clerk of Court at the Courthouse that issued the Divorce Decree. Many times they have forms available that you can fill out and file. Sometimes, they will have a person that can assist you with the process.
After the forms are filed, then the Husband usually needs to be "Served" with the Court Papers for the QDRO and request a Hearing on the Entry of the QDRO.
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