How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask JerrySJD Your Own Question

JerrySJD
JerrySJD, Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 821
Experience:  Divorce, child custody, support, mediation, alimony
62699694
Type Your Family Law Question Here...
JerrySJD is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

My husband filed a devorce and right now, is temporary having

Customer Question

My husband filed a devorce and right now, is temporary having a full custody of our daughters, 7 adn 8, because of my drinking problem, which I went through 90 day recovery program and is under control. I get to see kids only 2/week visitation days only for the next 90 days while devorce process is unsure but will be moving forward. I don't know what to do. When can I get my custoday (legal & physical) right back? I don't want devorce and get back to the house with my family together.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  JerrySJD replied 2 years ago.

JerrySJD :

You are doing great. If you stay away from alcohol, you may well be able to reconcile. It is absolutely imperative that you not drink at all. Over time, when you show your progress, you can talk more and more about reconciliation. You can tell your husband, the social worker and the court that you want to reconcile. Everyone likes a happy ending and they will help you Right now it is too soon. Every day you will get stronger. Do not drink and it can work out.

JerrySJD :

At every opportunity tell your husband that you want to reconcile. That you love him.

JerrySJD :

The only way to quit drinking is to not drink.

JerrySJD :

Sounds simple, but it is true. The longer you go, the stronger you will get. They say it takes about a year to really get the stuff out of your system, maybe more. However, you should notice a big difference already. If you are still drinking, even a little, you will have great difficulty achieving your goal.

Customer:

Thank you for your quick response.


 


I was going to rewrite my question in more detail and here is the edition:


You may have a different answer.


 


My husband filed a DV case restraining order against me followed by divorce in September 2011 because of my prolonged drinking problem (I was arrested due to disturbance in the late August, which triggered him to do this action this time). During the TRO I took my drinking issue very seriously and put myself into 90 day alcohol rehab program. I successfully completed the program and my drinking is under control. He agreed DV case be expired on 12/19 with the agreement of me living separate, my husband temporary having a full custody of our daughters, 7 and 8, and I get to see my kids only 2/week visitation for the next 90 days. While divorce process is unsure but it is up to him to move forward, I don't know what to do. I don't want divorce and get back to the house with my family together, but it seems unfair that he enjoys the power and control he is entitled to at this point, and occupies the house I used to live with his side of family while isolating me from everything. I feel very bitter about the situation. I want my kids back so much. I have an attorney right now, who says basically what my husband is doing is very generous and I should have agreed whatever he demanded in order to get the DV case expired, which it did. When can I get my joint custody back? Can he reissue the RO again if I try to fight over the agreement? Please help.

JerrySJD :

When you say your drinking is under control, does this mean you do not drink?

JerrySJD :

If the divorce is still ongoing, you have a chance to reconcile. Now that the DV case has expired and you are clean, maybe you can reconcile. To get custody back you will need to be clean, have a place to live and a place for the children. Then you can file a motion for custody. Very tough due to the DV order, but in time you might get it. The best result is a reconcilation based on your sobriety. Your husband will have to agree, obviously. It all depends on how you do. It is too soon to file any motions right now, you need a track record of success and stability to get the kids back. You will have that if you do not drink.

JerrySJD :

The only way to quit drinking is to not drink - zero, nada, null set. You will not be missing anything, you will get your life back and you will feel great too. Keep up the good work, stay sober, be nice to your husband and tell him you want to get back together. Reclaim that which is yours. You can only do it if you are completely sober.

JerrySJD :

If you are sober, you will recover and everything will work out.

JerrySJD :

Even if you get divorced, you will get you will at the very least get ample visitation. Once you rebuild your relationship with your daughters (who love you by the way), everything will come together. Try to make friends with your husband if you can. It is a start.

JerrySJD :

Thank you for using JustAnswer! Please click "Accept". If you need more, please let me know.

JerrySJD :

Bonuses are always appreciated!

JerrySJD :

Are you there? Are you ok?

Customer:

 


Thank you so much, Jerry. Your advice made me realized what is most important for me to do at this point. (1) It is too soon to do motion so wait, (2) keep up my sobriety, (3) be nice to my husband and be friend with him (this part is tough because I have too much resentments toward him, but I will try). I will accept but I will need more help. What should I do?

JerrySJD, Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 821
Experience: Divorce, child custody, support, mediation, alimony
JerrySJD and 7 other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Expert:  JerrySJD replied 2 years ago.

You are doing great. Try to get some exercise and eat well today. A multivitamin is good too. Take care of yourself and take advantage of this time to build your strength.

 

Happy New Year and thank you for the "Accept"!

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • Not only did he answer my Michigan divorce question but was also able to help me out with it, too. I have since won my legal case on this matter and thank you so much for it. Lee Michigan
< Last | Next >
  • Not only did he answer my Michigan divorce question but was also able to help me out with it, too. I have since won my legal case on this matter and thank you so much for it. Lee Michigan
  • Mr. Kaplun clearly had an exceptional understanding of the issue and was able to explain it concisely. I would recommend JustAnswer to anyone. Great service that lives up to its promises! Gary B. Edmond, OK
  • My Expert was fast and seemed to have the answer to my taser question at the tips of her fingers. Communication was excellent. I left feeling confident in her answer. Eric Redwood City, CA
  • I am very pleased with JustAnswer as a place to go for divorce or criminal law knowledge and insight. Michael Wichita, KS
  • PaulMJD helped me with questions I had regarding an urgent legal matter. His answers were excellent. Three H. Houston, TX
  • Anne was extremely helpful. Her information put me in the right direction for action that kept me legal, possible saving me a ton of money in the future. Thank you again, Anne!! Elaine Atlanta, GA
  • It worked great. I had the facts and I presented them to my ex-landlord and she folded and returned my deposit. The 50 bucks I spent with you solved my problem. Tony Apopka, FL
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Ely

    Counselor at Law

    Satisfied Customers:

    8085
    Private practice with focus on family, criminal, PI, consumer protection, and business consultation.
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/RA/ratioscripta/2012-6-13_2955_foto3.64x64.jpg Ely's Avatar

    Ely

    Counselor at Law

    Satisfied Customers:

    8085
    Private practice with focus on family, criminal, PI, consumer protection, and business consultation.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/LA/LawTalk/2012-6-6_17379_LawTalk.64x64.JPG LawTalk's Avatar

    LawTalk

    Attorney and Counselor at Law

    Satisfied Customers:

    6424
    27+ years legal experience. I remain current in Family Law through regular continuing education.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/FL/FLAandNYLawyer/2012-1-27_14349_3Fotolia25855429M.64x64.jpg FiveStarLaw's Avatar

    FiveStarLaw

    Lawyer

    Satisfied Customers:

    6336
    25 years of experience helping people like you.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/dkaplun/2009-05-17_173121_headshot_1_2.jpg Dimitry K., Esq.'s Avatar

    Dimitry K., Esq.

    Attorney

    Satisfied Customers:

    5987
    I provide family and divorce law advice to my clients in my firm.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/MU/multistatelaw/2011-11-27_173951_Tinaglamourshotworkglow102011.64x64.jpg Tina's Avatar

    Tina

    Lawyer

    Satisfied Customers:

    5773
    JD, 15 years legal experience including family law
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/BrianTMayer/2010-01-06_200119_BM.jpg Brandon M.'s Avatar

    Brandon M.

    Family Law Attorney

    Satisfied Customers:

    3810
    Attorney experienced in all aspects of family law
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/TU/TUSA/2012-6-6_55219_test.64x64.png Thoreau (T-USA)'s Avatar

    Thoreau (T-USA)

    Lawyer

    Satisfied Customers:

    2634
    Attorney