The answer is "absoultely not". The two of you can come to a private agreement and decide who has primary physical custody of your daughter and how any visitation schedule might work if that is what you want to do. You can do this without involving the courts -- you can simply sit down together and hash all of this out between you -- however, I do suggest that the two of you put your agreement in writing so that there are no issues or problems at a later date where she may be claiming that you agreed to something and you did not agree to whatever it was that your ex is claiming. If it is in writing and issues arise later you simply pull out the agreement and stick to it. Another advantage of NOT involving the courts is that the two of you can change the arrangement when you please without having to go to the time and expense of going back to court to have a judge review and approve changes to the agreement.
You can also do this formally through the family court without being divorced -- you can obtain the forms for custody /visitation at the clerk's office of your nearest family court and they are relatively straightforward forms that the two of you can complete and then submit them to the court for a judge's approval of the custody arrangement.
I hope that this information helps. Please let me know if you have additional questions?
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