Dear JACUSTOMER - The reason the alienation of affection laws have been revoked in all but a very few states is so that legal action cannot be taken against third parties and marital infidelity is simply an issue between the married parties. You can obviously not continue your friendship but legally there is no action you can take against him. Taking legal action against the other man isn't going to improve your marital relationship so there really is no advantage to you and the damage you suffered was ultimately caused by your wife assuming she consented to the affair.
You can expose him publicly if that will embarrass him but in today's morality I doubt anyone would care. The only person subject to legal action in this situation is your wife if you choose to file for divorce.
The way I found out about the affair is my wife and I share a computer. One day she accidentally left her yahoo account signed on and left the machine running. I went to use the computer and one of his love letters to her was staring me in the face.
Since her eMail account was already logged on, (I didn’t hack into it), I found 18 months worth of letters back and forth between them. Including, detailed arrangements they made to meet in hotels, dinner reservations, pet names for their genitals, etc, etc.
In an effort to expose him publicly, what are my limits? For example, can I put up a webpage detailing his affair with my wife and then tweet the webpage address to everyone I know? I have over 10,000 twitter friends.
I also considered posting a comment on his YouTube videos exposing the affair along with a link back to webpage containing details of the affair.
Since I didn’t hack her account, and it’s a shared computer, can I post the contents of the letters on the Internet?
I agree with you that a suit from him is unlikely since it would only draw more attention to his hypocrisy. I think we're done with this line of questioning. If I need additional advice, can I address questions directly to you? I assume there will be additional fees.
DISCLAIMER: Answers from Experts on JustAnswer are not substitutes for the advice of an attorney. JustAnswer is a public forum and questions and responses are not private or confidential or protected by the attorney-client privilege. The Expert above is not your attorney, and the response above is not legal advice. You should not read this response to propose specific action or address specific circumstances, but only to give you a sense of general principles of law that might affect the situation you describe. Application of these general principles to particular circumstances must be done by a lawyer who has spoken with you in confidence, learned all relevant information, and explored various options. Before acting on these general principles, you should hire a lawyer licensed to practice law in the jurisdiction to which your question pertains.
The responses above are from individual Experts, not JustAnswer. The site and services are provided “as is”. To view the verified credential of an Expert, click on the “Verified” symbol in the Expert’s profile. This site is not for emergency questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals. Please carefully read the Terms of Service (last updated February 8, 2012).