Thank you in advance for any assistant that you can give me with respect to my situation.
I have been dating a man for 13 years. We live as neighbors for 11 years in southern California. He took a job in Northern California and wanted me to go with him but I would not go unmarried and would not leave my home, job, friends and family. Therefore, we proceeded to get married on 2/15/08. He moved before I did. I wanted and needed time to get my office in order and close out some of my files. Then with pressure from him, I to move to northern cal to be with him in May of 08. He did not want me to work and promised to pay for everything. I have a son from a prior marriage
as well. Neither one of us have ever lived together, just neighbors 3 houses away from one another. Trouble started the first week I moved there. He started yelling at me and telling me that this was his house, not mine and he constantly put downs about how he pays for everything. However, he would not give me a penny to even buy myself a new bra or my son any kind of school items, clothing or necessities. He was very controlling. I told him that I wanted to go back to work and he said no, you need to stay home but all the time he was putting me down for not working. Very contradicting.
In any event, about a year and 10 months went by and we got in a hugh fight. I was tired of the way he treated me and having him kick me out all the time. I had no where to go and no job to get any money. I have worked for over 20 years and have always provided for my self and my son. I had no friends or family in Nor Cal either. On December of 09 he acted so crazy that I had to call the police on him. After that time, he filed for divorce
. He does not want to give me a penny. He said that our marriage was too short and he doesn’t have to give me a thing. He made me quit my job, give up my home of 22 years, friends and family and would not let me work and now he wants a divorce and will not give me a penny. I went to several attorney’s and all want to charge me a $15K retainer fee and said (maybe) they can get him to pay the legal fees but maybe not. I do not have that kind of money. I also had medical insurance for me and my son before I was married. Now, I will not even have medical insurance and I have medical conditions such as diabetic, etc. My son is in college and he also needs medical insurance. In addition, he made me sign a pr-nuptial agreement the day before the wedding. I felt pressured because I loved him so much and wanted to marry him. Neither one of us had it reviewed by a lawyer and he composed it himself from a site on the internet. I have been told that it is not legal since we did not have it reviewed and it was signed a day before the marriage... However, the lawyers I talk to said that it would be $15K for me to file a motion to quash it. In addition, they state that I would probably be entitled to some support but probably less then the $15K retainer. Therefore, I am stuck on how to get any help or what I should do. I was served with the Stipulated Judgment that I have to review and sign and it is giving all my rights away and -0- support. He works for the State and makes about $70K a year. He has great retirement benefits that he wants me to sign off on them as well. He wants me to sign off being his beneficiary as well. I do not know what to do. I do not know if it is worth fighting but I gave up everything for this man and he walks away with everything and more and still has his same job and home and I have nothing. All my family now has moved to Dallas Texas and he will not even help me with the expenses to move there but that is the only place that I have any family to go to.
What I guess I would like to know, is it worth the $15K to fight him? Or, is better to just walk away and learn a very hard lesson?
Any advise you may have is sooo much appreciated.