if you have been living in North Carolina for the past 2 years, North Carolina has jurisdiction over the marriage
and you would be able to proceed there. Unlike New York, NC is a "no-fault" divorce state, meaning that irreconcilable differences
arising in the marriage is a sufficient basis for a divorce. More than one state can have jurisdiction over a marriage at a time, but it is governed by where the parties reside, not where the marriage took place. Since she is in NY, you could proceed there is you really wanted to, but I could not see the advantage in doing so.
I would also suggest that you just pay an attorney for 1-2 hours of his/her time before filing; it's not uncommon for one spouse to continuing paying the other's bills post-separation
, and you can oftentimes get credit for those bills to offset things like alimony
(and before you start worrying about alimony, rest assured that, based on what you have told me, any obligation that you might have would be minimal and short-term).
Let me know if more information is needed, and please remember to click "accept". Thank you.