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TJ, Esq.
TJ, Esq., Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 9776
Experience:  Licensed to Practice Law
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A YEAR HAS PASTED SINCE THE COURT APPOINTED MY EX PRIMARY CUSTODY

Customer Question

A YEAR HAS PASTED SINCE THE COURT APPOINTED MY EX PRIMARY CUSTODY OF MY DAUGHTER. SHE KEEPS INSISTING TO STAY WITH MY HUSBAND AND I BECAUSE HER FATHER CAN'T PLACE HER AT THE TOP OF HIS LIST OF IMPORTANCE. THE GUY IS NORMALLY BUSY WITH WORK AND HER SCHOOL ISN'T EVEN IMPORTANT. MY DAUGHTER MISBEHAVED IN KINDERGARTEN AND NEITHER THE TEACHER OR DAD BOTHERED TO ARRANGE A MEETING. MY DAUGHTER WEARS SMALL TIGHT CLOTHES AND HIS EXCUSE IS THAT HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY MONEY. I GETTING INVOLVED WITH SCHOOL BY REQUESTING FOR PUBLIC RECORDS AND INSISTING ON GETTING AN ACTIVATION CODE TO USE ON SCHOOL WEBSITE AND REMAIN IN CONTACT WITH THE TEACHERS. I PROVIDE EVERYTHING THAT'S NEEDED FOR MY DAUGHTER-I ENJOY MAKING HER HAPPY. MY QUESTION-WHAT DOCUMENTS OR PROOF CAN BE USED TO DEMONSTRATE THAT HE'S FAILING WITH HIS RESPONSIBILITIES? CAN MY 6 YEAR OLD WORDS BE HELPFUL IF DETERMINED UNDER A SPECIALIST?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  TJ, Esq. replied 5 years ago.

Hello and thank you for allowing me the opportunity to assist you.

Question: “MY QUESTION-WHAT DOCUMENTS OR PROOF CAN BE USED TO DEMONSTRATE THAT HE'S FAILING WITH HIS RESPONSIBILITIES? CAN MY 6 YEAR OLD WORDS BE HELPFUL IF DETERMINED UNDER A SPECIALIST?”

Answer: Unfortunately, a court cannot amend a custody order unless there has been (1) a substantial and material change of circumstances, and (2) the welfare of the child will be promoted by the change in custody.

I’m sorry to say that a missed teacher meeting and tight clothes is probably not nearly enough to have custody changed. First, it’s arguable whether your child’s welfare is at stake. The skipped meeting and the clothes, while I can understand your concerns, aren’t likely to be considered major issues. The judge would probably rule that you are free to buy your child larger clothes, and that you’re free to attend a teacher meeting if you feel it’s necessary (assuming you have joint legal custody). In addition, a child’s preferences are not given much weight until he/she is much older than kindergarten age (e.g. 14 years old).

I really wish I had better new for you.

Have I satisfactorily addressed your concerns? If not, then please feel free to ask for clarification. Also, if you added details in the “Optional Information” or “Already Tried” fields that I did not address in my answer, then I apologize. Questions are often posted for the experts to answer prior to the completion of those fields. Just let me know that I missed something pertinent and I’ll be happy to get back to you.

I regret that my answer is unfavorable, but please understand that it would be unfair to you (and unprofessional of me) to provide you with anything less than a truthful response. With that in mind, I hope that you found some value in my answer. If so, then please remember to click the green accept button so that I will receive credit and compensation for my time. Positive feedback is always appreciated as well. Thank you and good luck!

.

DISCLAIMER: Please be aware that only an attorney licensed in your state is authorized to advise you in legal matters, and that the limitations of this setting may prevent your legal issues from being thoroughly addressed. Accordingly, please understand that (1) by answering your question(s) I am not acting as your attorney, (2) my answer(s) should be construed as general information only, and (3) our discussion is not an adequate substitute for an in-person consultation with an attorney.

 

Customer: replied 5 years ago.

 

SO HIS PARENTAL RESPONSIBILITIES CAN'T BE CALLED INTO QUESTION? HE HAS FAILED TO MAINTAIN THE MEDICAL INSURANCE AND FAILED TO GET MY DAUGHTER VACCINED FOR HEPATITIS B. I HAVE TAKEN COMPLETE CARE OF MY DAUGHTERS NEEDS-TWO DAYS FROM NOW I'M TAKING HER TO THE DENTIST FOR A CHECK UP. MY DAUGHTER GETS SICK EVERYTIME DUE TO HER FATHER. YOUR TELLING ME THERE'S NOTHING THAT CAN BE DONE?

Expert:  TJ, Esq. replied 5 years ago.

Hi again.

Question: “SO HIS PARENTAL RESPONSIBILITIES CAN'T BE CALLED INTO QUESTION? HE HAS FAILED TO MAINTAIN THE MEDICAL INSURANCE AND FAILED TO GET MY DAUGHTER VACCINED FOR HEPATITIS B. I HAVE TAKEN COMPLETE CARE OF MY DAUGHTERS NEEDS-TWO DAYS FROM NOW I'M TAKING HER TO THE DENTIST FOR A CHECK UP. MY DAUGHTER GETS SICK EVERYTIME DUE TO HER FATHER. YOUR TELLING ME THERE'S NOTHING THAT CAN BE DONE?”

Answer: Well no, that’s not exactly what I wrote. I wrote that a court cannot amend a custody order unless there has been (1) a substantial and material change of circumstances, and (2) the welfare of the child will be promoted by the change in custody. I also wrote that the skipped meeting and the tight clothes probably doesn’t meet that standard.

However, now you’re throwing out other problems such as a failure to maintain medical insurance, a failure to get your daughter vaccinated, and continuous illnesses (due to neglect?). All of those issues combined, and if there are others, may rise to the level of a substantial change in circumstances that warrants a change in custody. It’s still a difficult burden to meet, but the more incidents there are, the more likely the burden can be met. Based on the additional incidents, you may want to file a motion to change custody … however, be prepared to prove your accusations. If it looks like you’re squabbling over minor things rather than bringing a serious issue to the judge, it’s possible that he’ll not only rule against you, but that he’ll order you to pay your ex’s attorney’s fees.

Have I satisfactorily addressed your concerns? If not, then please feel free to ask for clarification. Also, if you added details in the “Optional Information” or “Already Tried” fields that I did not address in my answer, then I apologize. Questions are often posted for the experts to answer prior to the completion of those fields. Just let me know that I missed something pertinent and I’ll be happy to get back to you.

If the information that I provided is helpful, then please remember to click the green accept button so that I will receive credit and compensation for my time. Positive feedback is always appreciated as well. Thank you and good luck!

.

DISCLAIMER: Please be aware that only an attorney licensed in your state is authorized to advise you in legal matters, and that the limitations of this setting may prevent your legal issues from being thoroughly addressed. Accordingly, please understand that (1) by answering your question(s) I am not acting as your attorney, (2) my answer(s) should be construed as general information only, and (3) our discussion is not an adequate substitute for an in-person consultation with an attorney.

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