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LawTalk, Attorney and Counselor at Law
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34913
Experience:  30 years legal experience. I remain current in Family Law through regular continuing education.
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My daughter is 17 and will be starting college this fall @

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My daughter is 17 and will be starting college this fall @ ? maybe Princeton. I have asked her mom where and if our daughter will be receiving any scholarship support. No answer has been forthcoming. Do I have a right to the information above? How can I receive or find the information above? I have no cooperation from my ex-wife.

If my daughter is receiveing financial support to reduce our costs of her education, am I entitled to a reduction of my out of pocket expenses as well? Thanks.
Good morning,

Can you explain a bit more about your situation. Is there a divorce decree which makes you liable for payment of either part or all of your daughter's college education?

What type of out of pocket expenses are you talking about?

I’ll put forth my best effort in assisting you. When you are able to respond to my request for clarification of your situation, I’ll be able to assist you. In the meantime I would ask that you please stay on-line, just in case I need additional clarification from you regarding the factual circumstances relating to your question. Thank you for allowing me to help.


Customer: replied 7 years ago.

Yes, there is a divorce decree that states I am responsible for 1/2 of all my child's college costs/expenses (tuition, room, board, books, etc.)


I am just wondering if the college will bill me or her mom will try to send me copies of bills she has received from the college and have me pay support to her instead of to the college.

Good morning,

I'm sorry to hear of your dilemma.

Let me caution you that you are about to enter a situation in which, if your ex chooses to, you are going to be nickeled and dimed to death.

I urge you not to pay a dime unless and until you have legitimate copies of bills in front of you and, do not pay your ex directly--as this will be a reason for her to pad the bills.

Pay only by check or cashier's check and make each individual check payable to the appropriate payee. The moment your daughter turns 18, pay her directly for out of pocket expenses like shampoo and toothpaste.

To begin with, you have absolutely every right to be a part of the process as it applies to the anticipated costs. If your ex is being difficult about sharing the basic financial information you will need to arrange for payment, I'd suggest that you tell her that her failure to cooperate may mean that bills don't get paid on time and that there is a possibility that your daughter will have problems signing up for classes.

Also be aware that you may not be told about scholarships, grants or loans that she may get while attending school. I would advise you that since you are paying half the bill, that you arrange for the ability to discuss directly with the university, landlord etc., any questions dealing with finances you might have.

The court will not force you to be "had" by a vindictive ex. Make a stand early on so that there is no confusion that while you are willing to meet your agreed on obligations, that you will not allow your ex to abuse the situation by manipulating the timing or accuracy of information you receive.

I wish you the best.

Thank you very much for having allowed me to assist you. It would be greatly appreciated if you would click the green Accept icon so that I can receive credit for having assisted you.

Best regards,


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