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Guru_Guy
Guru_Guy, Family Law Attorney
Category: Family Law
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Experience:  Experienced advisor in all aspects of family law (divorce, custody, support, etc.).
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i cannot communicate with my childs biological father on the

Customer Question

i cannot communicate with my childs biological father on the right way and time to explain to my 3 yr old he is his father. we were never married. i have been with a man since i was 3 months pregnant recently married and my child has known him as daddy from day one . at 3 after filing for child support his biol. filed for visitation. he has seen him 10 weekends and is now telling my son he is his daddy and my child is confused. i keep telling him there is time for that not to confuse him until he gets comfortable. is there anything i can do? he is insisting to have him call him daddy after first agreeing to take it slow. now he is wanting my son to call my husband stepdad and him dad when he has always known my husband as daddy. would a phsychiatrist help and can his bio. be ordered to attend?
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Guru_Guy replied 8 years ago.

Hello,

It certainly sounds like a difficult situation.

However, as a matter of law, the biological father has a right to say how the child is raised, even if he did not exercise those rights in the first few years.

If you believe that some practice is psychologically damaging to the child, you can go to court and seek to put modifications on visitation that limit what the father can do or say to the child when in his custody. However, a court is likely to allow a biological father to insist the child call him Dad, even if that causes some confusion. A court has the power to insist the father attend counseling sessions, but a court is unlikely to require that unless there is some real sign that the sign is really being psychologically harmed by the behavior. The confusion of having two men insist on calling him daddy is likely not sufficient. Of course, this is a matter of discretion for the judge, so I cannot say definitively what a judge might do.

If you want to try to get such conditions added to visitation, I suggest you to take the child to a child psychologist who can confirm (and testify) that harm is being done in the existing situation and what needs to change. Then have an attorney seek to place conditions on the visitation in order to ensure the child is not harmed.

The other possible thing you may want to consider is seeing whether the biological father would be willing to step away from the child's life and allow your husband to adopt the child. In exchange, he would be relieved of his child support obligation.

I hope this helps!


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Please keep in mind that information in this forum is for informational purposes only. It is not legal advice and does not constitute creation of an attorney client relationship. Before acting on any such information, you are always advised to consult with an attorney licensed to practice in your jurisdiction who can take the time to review all the facts and laws relevant to your situation.

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